Self Esteem

Do you know anyone with dyslexia or other learning difficulties?  If so, please encourage them to read the following two articles, as they were written especially to remind them how wonderful they are and to help them cope with some of the special difficulties they may face in life.

But whether or not you may have such difficulties yourself, please read these articles too and put them into practice yourself.  You too are a wonderful person, and you too will sometimes face difficulties that may cause you to lower your own self esteem.  Remember it doesn't have to be this way!

Ten  Steps  to  Higher  Self  Esteem 

1)    Look at your experience as a whole. Recognise the significance that your learning difference has for you in your life. Do not blame or put yourself down in any way for any difficulties you have had or still have.

2)    Respect yourself and acknowledge your achievements and abilities.

Always give yourself credit where it is due and never underestimate the value or significance of any of your achievements.

3)    Recognise that you have faced difficulties and come

through them no matter how imperfect you may sometimes

judge your performance to be.

4)    Never fear failure, simply acknowledge it as feedback.

If something doesn't work out use the experience as an

opportunity to learn what is needed in order to change the result next time.

5)    Be flexible in all things. Realise that there is not just one way to succeed and win in life. Find what your talents and abilities are and nurture them.

This will help to build a strong foundation from which you can move towards what is for you success and a fulfilling life.

6)    Set realistic goals and break tasks down into manageable chunks.

This will help you to progress in a steady and consistent fashion and experience an increasing sense of achievement.

7)    Be your own judge and determine your own values and standards.

If you are true to yourself and make your sense of self-worth independent of external factors you will greatly enhance your self-esteem.

8)    Make a commitment with yourself to use affirmations, visualisation, positive thinking or any other technique that works for you to build and reinforce your self-esteem.

9)    Make a firm commitment to be kind to yourself.

Appreciate your strengths, acknowledge your weaknesses and learn from them but don’t dwell on them.

Give yourself the priceless gift of unconditional positive self-regard.

10) Accept ups and downs and be aware of change so you can adapt and move with it.

Most of all keep applying and living the Ten Steps to Self Esteem as only through working at them and believing in them will you gain the reward of life-long higher self esteem.

John M. Parke, ©1997 (dyslexic)

Counselling Adviser to the Adult Dyslexia Organisation (UK)

Ten  Tips  for  Adults  with  Specific Learning Difficulties

What do you like doing?         What are you good at?

Make a note of your strengths.

Try to become aware of yourself and the way you work or carry out everyday tasks. People usually cope best when they know about themselves.

Be aware of how you feel and what happens when you are tired, or stressed, and work out how to cope with it. People with Specific Learning Difficulties are more prone to stress and tiredness - these can make it worse.

Therefore develop your coping strategies - do not give up on writing cheques or memorising phone numbers. Have a go at alternative ways of remembering things. Carry 'aids' around with you such as checklists, Post-Its etc.

Consider what you find difficult.

Realise that there are things which everyone finds difficult.

Sometimes people push themselves too hard.

However if you really cannot (for example) do maths, then don't try for a job which might involve a lot of adding up or measuring.

 

Have an aim and go for it - on a small scale or on a large scale.

Write it down and put it up on the wall in front of you.

This helps focus the mind in work sessions.

Be aware of what you are aiming for and where you are going.

Think positively; expect to succeed.

Or at least, do not expect to fail - a 'failing complex' can quickly lead to failure. Sports people talk about developing the 'inner game' - they go out and expect to win and this gives them more confidence.

Decide if you are going to tell people about your Specific Learning Difficulties, and think about how you will say it, for example:

“It’s a different way of thinking and working”

“My spelling is a bit unreliable but I’m fine using a spellchecker on the computer”.

Remember there are things that you can do (due to the way you think and how you see things)  that other people find almost impossible ….

Adapted by Melanie Jameson from an information sheet by Dorothy Gilroy, Bangor Dyslexia Unit

Easy Meditation Techniques for Beginners

by

Jon McMiller

Meditation For Beginners

Meditation can offer a range of mental health benefits and induce positive behavioral and emotional changes, such as increasing compassion and generosity as well as promoting a sense of well-being and serenity.

Meditation can also bring about physiological changes, which can have important health benefits. These changes include lowered blood pressure, reduced levels of stress hormones and increased levels of chemicals in the brain that enhance mood stability.

While the benefits are numerous, becoming skilled in the techniques of meditation can take time. Here, we provide some simple beginner meditation techniques, which will help you embark on the journey to a calmer you.

Make Yourself Comfortable

Ensuring that you are comfortable while you meditate will essentially guarantee that your meditation experiences are a success.

Follow these suggestions to get the most out of meditation:

Wear Loose Clothing - Wear something comfortable and remove your shoes, as any form of physical discomfort may be distracting.

Stretch First - Stretching will loosen muscles, allowing you to sit more comfortably, and also helps to focus your attention on your body.

Experiment - Find a comfortable position. Try sitting or lying in various poses, and opening or closing your eyes. There are no rules, just do what feels right.

Designate a Specific Area - Choose a room in your house that you do not use for sleep, work or exercise. Decorate it with art if you choose, or scented candles.

Take Meditation Seriously

A determination to make meditation a permanent part of your daily life will greatly improve your chances of having a successful experience.

Try these tips on how to commit to meditation:

Make It A Formal Practice - Schedule a time, preferably twice daily, that you can set aside for meditation. This will help create good habits, which you can then maintain.

Show Purpose - Meditation is not passive, and to succeed, you will actively need to focus your attention on a single point. This will become easier with practice.

Use Resources - Read books and articles on meditation, watch DVDs and attend a class. These will help you understand the process and also appreciate the benefits.

Don't Expect Immediate Results - Meditation is a long-term process. It's important not to expect your life to change overnight. Stick with it, do it often and be patient.

Focus On How You Feel

Meditation emphasizes the importance of being emotionally in touch with yourself, and it's important to practice focusing on how your mind and body feel.

Try starting with these areas to focus on:

Recognize Frustration - If you feel frustrated during meditation, it is important to identify this, take a break and return later. Don't make meditation a chore.

Focus On Your Body Parts - Start by focusing on your feet and work your way up the body. This is a great way for beginners to increase their relaxation and focus.

Notice When Your Interest Begins To Wane - Meditation can be hard work, and it's important to recognize and celebrate your achievements. The times when you find yourself less engaged in meditation are the times when you need to practice the most.

Hopefully, following these simple guidelines will help you get the most out of your meditation experience and reap the rewards in both body and in mind.

Learn more about meditation and get free meditation techniques at www.meditationprofessor.com

There Is A Science of Getting Rich

Chapter 2 of "The Science of Getting Rich"

by

Wallace D Wattles

There is a science of getting rich, and it is an exact science, like algebra or arithmetic. There are certain laws which govern the process of acquiring riches, and once these laws are learned and obeyed by anyone, that person will get rich with mathematical certainty.

The ownership of money and property comes as a result of doing things in a certain way, and those who do things in this certain way - whether on purpose or accidentally - get rich, while those who do not do things in this certain way - no matter how hard they work or how able they are - remain poor.

It is a natural law that like causes always produce like effects, and, therefore, any man or woman who learns to do things in this certain way will infallibly get rich.

That the above statement is true is shown by the following facts:

Getting rich is not a matter of environment, for if it were, all the people in certain neighborhoods would become wealthy. The people of one city would all be rich, while those of other towns would all be poor, or all the inhabitants of one state would roll in wealth, while those of an adjoining state would be in poverty. But everywhere we see rich and poor living side by side, in the same environment, and often engaged in the same vocations. When two people are in the same locality and in the same business, and one gets rich while the other remains poor, it shows that getting rich is not primarily a matter of environment. Some environments may be more favorable than others, but when two people in the same business are in the same neighborhood and one gets rich while the other fails, it indicates that getting rich is the result of doing things in a certain way.

And further, the ability to do things in this certain way is not due solely to the possession of talent, for many people who have great talent remain poor, while others who have very little talent get rich.

Studying the people who have gotten rich, we find that they are an average lot in all respects, having no greater talents and abilities than other people have. It is evident that they do not get rich because they possess talents and abilities that others do not have, but because they happen to do things in a certain way.

Getting rich is not the result of saving, or thrift. Many very penurious people are poor, while free spenders often get rich. Nor is getting rich due to doing things which others fail to do, for two people in the same business often do almost exactly the same things, and one gets rich while the other remains poor or becomes bankrupt.

From all these things, we must come to the conclusion that getting rich is the result of doing things in a certain way.

If getting rich is the result of doing things in a certain way, and if like causes always produce like effects, then any man or woman who can do things in that way can become rich, and the whole matter is brought within the domain of exact science.

The question arises here as to whether this certain way may not be so difficult that only a few may follow it. As we have seen, this cannot be true (as far as natural ability is concerned). Talented people get rich, and blockheads get rich; intellectually brilliant people get rich, and very stupid people get rich; physically strong people get rich, and weak and sickly people get rich.

Some degree of ability to think and understand is, of course, essential, but insofar as natural ability is concerned, any man or woman who has sense enough to read and understand these words can certainly get rich.

Also, we have seen that it is not a matter of environment. Yes, location counts for something. One would not go to the heart of the Sahara and expect to do successful business.

Getting rich involves the necessity of dealing with people and of being where there are people to deal with, and if these people are inclined to deal in the way you want to deal, so much the better. But that is about as far as environment goes. If anybody else in your town can get rich, so can you, and if anybody else in your state can get rich, so can you.

Again, it is not a matter of choosing some particular business or profession. People get rich in every business and in every profession, while their next door neighbors in the very same vocation remain in poverty.

It is true that you will do best in a business which you like and which is congenial to you. And if you have certain talents which are well developed, you will do best in a business which calls for the exercise of those talents.

Also, you will do best in a business which is suited to your locality: An ice cream parlor would do better in a warm climate than in Greenland, and a salmon fishery will succeed better in the northwest than in Florida, where there are no salmon.

But, aside from these general limitations, getting rich is not dependent upon your engaging in some particular business, but upon your learning to do things in a certain way. If you are now in business and anybody else in your locality is getting rich in the same business, while you are not getting rich, it is simply because you are not doing things in the same way that the other person is doing them.

No one is prevented from getting rich by lack of capital. True, as you get capital the increase becomes more easy and rapid, but one who has capital is already rich and does not need to consider how to become so. No matter how poor you may be, if you begin to do things in the certain way you will begin to get rich and you will begin to have capital. The getting of capital is a part of the process of getting rich and it is a part of the result which invariably follows the doing of things in the certain way.

You may be the poorest person on the continent and be deeply in debt. You may have neither friends, influence, nor resources, but if you begin to do things in this way, you must infallibly begin to get rich, for like causes must produce like effects. If you have no capital, you can get capital. If you are in the wrong business, you can get into the right business. If you are in the wrong location, you can go to the right location.

And you can do so by beginning in your present business and in your present location to do things in the certain way which always causes success. You must begin to live in harmony with the laws governing the universe.

The Right to be Rich

For those who do not know, Wallace D Wattle's book, "The Science of Getting Rich" was written in 1910, and is believed to have inspired Napoleon Hill to write "Think and Grow Rich".  It was also the original inspiration for the book and film "The Secret".

I strongly believe that one of the biggest stumbling blocks most of us have when trying to become wealthier is a subconscious belief that we do not deserve wealth, or even a feeling of guilt about wanting to be rich.  Wattles addressed this issue in the first chapter of his book, so here is Chapter 1: The Right To Be Rich

"Whatever may be said in praise of poverty, the fact remains that it is not possible to live a really complete or successful life unless one is rich. No one can rise to his greatest possible height in talent or soul development unless he has plenty of money, for to unfold the soul and to develop talent he must have many things to use, and he cannot have these things unless he has money to buy them with.

A person develops in mind, soul, and body by making use of things, and society is so organized that we must have money in order to become the possessors of things. Therefore, the basis of all advancement must be the science of getting rich.

The object of all life is development, and everything that lives has an inalienable right to all the development it is capable of attaining.

A person's right to life means his right to have the free and unrestricted use of all the things which may be necessary to his fullest mental, spiritual, and physical unfoldment; or, in other words, his right to be rich.

In this book, I shall not speak of riches in a figurative way. To be really rich does not mean to be satisfied or contented with a little. No one ought to be satisfied with a little if he is capable of using and enjoying more. The purpose of nature is the advancement and unfoldment of life, and everyone should have all that can contribute to the power, elegance, beauty, and richness of life. To be content with less is sinful.

The person who owns all he wants for the living of all the life he is capable of living is rich, and no person who has not plenty of money can have all he wants. Life has advanced so far and become so complex that even the most ordinary man or woman requires a great amount of wealth in order to live in a manner that even approaches completeness. Every person naturally wants to become all that they are capable of becoming. This desire to realize innate possibilities is inherent in human nature; we cannot help wanting to be all that we can be. Success in life is becoming what you want to be. You can become what you want to be only by making use of things, and you can have the free use of things only as you become rich enough to buy them. To understand the science of getting rich is therefore the most essential of all knowledge.

There is nothing wrong in wanting to get rich. The desire for riches is really the desire for a richer, fuller, and more abundant life - and that desire is praiseworthy. The person who does not desire to live more abundantly is abnormal, and so the person who does not desire to have money enough to buy all he wants is abnormal.

There are three motives for which we live: We live for the body, we live for the mind, we live for the soul. No one of these is better or holier than the other; all are alike desirable, and no one of the three - body, mind, or soul - can live fully if either of the others is cut short of full life and expression. It is not right or noble to live only for the soul and deny mind or body, and it is wrong to live for the intellect and deny body or soul.

We are all acquainted with the loathsome consequences of living for the body and denying both mind and soul, and we see that real life means the complete expression of all that a person can give forth through body, mind, and soul. Whatever he can say, no one can be really happy or satisfied unless his body is living fully in its every function, and unless the same is true of his mind and his soul. Wherever there is unexpressed possibility or function not performed, there is unsatisfied desire. Desire is possibility seeking expression or function seeking performance.

A person cannot live fully in body without good food, comfortable clothing, and warm shelter, and without freedom from excessive toil. Rest and recreation are also necessary to his physical life.

One cannot live fully in mind without books and time to study them, without opportunity for travel and observation, or without intellectual companionship.

To live fully in mind a person must have intellectual recreations, and must surround himself with all the objects of art and beauty he is capable of using and appreciating.

To live fully in soul, a person must have love, and love is denied fullest expression by poverty.

A person's highest happiness is found in the bestowal of benefits on those he loves; love finds its most natural and spontaneous expression in giving. The individual who has nothing to give cannot fill his place as a spouse or parent, as a citizen, or as a human being. It is in the use of material things that a person finds full life for his body, develops his mind, and unfolds his soul. It is therefore of supreme importance to each individual to be rich.

It is perfectly right that you should desire to be rich. If you are a normal man or woman you cannot help doing so. It is perfectly right that you should give your best attention to the science of getting rich, for it is the noblest and most necessary of all studies. If you neglect this study, you are derelict in your duty to yourself, to God and humanity, for you can render to God and humanity no greater service than to make the most of yourself."