Daydreams

Is there a place in your life for daydreaming?  Should there be?

I believe the answer is a very firm "yes"!

"Daydream" time is your opportunity to explore what it is you really want in life.  Most of us are so busy trying to get somewhere that we have never stopped and thought whether or not that is where we really want to be!  We also often "borrow" other people's ideas about what we should want.  Perhaps we have goals that were originally set by our parents.  Or that we have read about or heard friends discuss and think they should be our goals too.  Perhaps they should!  But also, perhaps not!  Or maybe we should retain those goals but there are other goals out there that really should have our name on, but that we have simply never considered.  So one reason to daydream is to allow new possible goals to arise and then to try them out and test them, see whether they fit.

You may already believe strongly in the power of visualization and practise this whenever you can.  Certainly this is a very good thing, and in a few days' time you may be reading an e-mail from me about visualization and distinguishing it from daydreaming.  I certainly encourage you to visualize and to do so powerfully.  But visualization is a very clear and directed process.  It is not the same as daydreaming.  When you visualize you already know very clearly what it is you want to achieve and that is what you focus on.  But when you daydream you are in a much freer state than when you visualize, and the purpose is quite different.  It is a time when you should completely let go and stop trying to control everything.  Allow the daydream to take over.  Just relax and let it flow.

After the daydream is over you can then analyze it.  How did it make you feel?  Did it introduce anything that you haven't previously considered?  Should you now consider that element or those elements?  I suggest you keep a daydream diary.  Record the results in that diary.  Then, from time to time get a bigger overall picture by reflecting on a number of different daydream sessions.

Try to create a habit of daydreaming.  This is easiest done if you try to do it at a similar time on a regular basis.

How often should you daydream?

This is a big question.  I suggest the answer will vary depending on where you are in your life right now.  If you have a lot you need to do and are under a lot of pressure then perhaps a daily practice would be too much.  But even if you are under pressure try to have a daydream session at least once a week.

How open should you be about spending time daydreaming?

Unless you are very lucky you will probably find even your closest loved ones may not understand why you need to daydream and may try to convince you not to "waste time" doing it.  It is probably easier simply to daydream when you can be by yourself and when nobody else will know that is what you are doing.  Maybe just say you are going to take a brief nap.  That is not really a lie, as it is more or less a kind of nap.  Your loved ones will probably believe you are tired and are having a nap to recover, but you haven't told them this, they have simply assumed it, so there are no untruths here.

Go on!  Try it!  Spend some time daydreaming.  You will find you should emerge from these sessions feeling more refreshed and energized, as well as quite possibly discovering something new and important about yourself and some of your hidden desires.

Law of Attraction

I have often referred to the Law of Attraction in my blog posts.  But what exactly is it, what does it do, how does it do it, and how important is it to you and your own personal development?

First let me clarify.  The Law of Attraction is not something you can choose to use or to ignore.  Whether or not you like it you are "using" it all the time.  Whether or not you believe in it, the Law of Attraction is working right now and even as you read this it is bringing certain things into your sphere of influence.

The concept is actually very simple.  Like attracts like.  If you focus on certain things, those things are more likely to be attracted into your life.

Most of us, unfortunately, use the Law of Attraction in completely the wrong way, and that is why we get the wrong results.

Notice I said if you focus on certain things, those are the kinds of things the Law of Attraction will bring to you.  Not necessarily exactly the same things, but at least vaguely similar.  Also, maybe only indirectly.  Perhaps what will come into your sphere will be an opportunity to begin obtaining what it is you have focussed on.  But you have to recognize that opportunity.  Most people do not recognize it and therefore do not take advantage of it - and then they complain that the Law of Attraction did not work because it did not bring them the things they wanted.  That is a very lazy attitude, and if you are lazy you are unlikely to get very far in obtaining whatever it is you want.

Even worse, far too many people focus on what is wrong in their life rather than what is good and could be great in their life.  If you focus on what is wrong you will simply attract more of it.  The Law of Attraction will work.  It will respond properly to the instructions you are effectively giving it.  But those instructions are for completely the wrong things.

Take wealth, for example.  When you consider your own wealth do you focus on the fact that you are not wealthy enough?  That you don't have the money you need in order to achieve whatever you want to achieve?  If so, you are probably condemning yourself to losing even the wealth you currently have.  Certainly you are making it much more likely that you will lose it.

Jesus told his disciples "Whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them." (Matthew 13:12).  There are a number of different interpretations of this, but one is that if you are someone who "does not have" it means you are focussed on that lack rather than the abundance you could have.  Focus on what you do have, albeit so small, and be thankful for it, and you will find it will increase - maybe directly, or maybe indirectly, with the Universe putting you in the right place at the right time to create more of that good in your life.

So take away these three things:

1. Stop focussing on things you do not want to have in your life.
2. Be grateful for all the good things in your life, and express that gratitude
3. Recognize that the Universe brings opportunities to you all the time to increase those good things in your life - look for those opportunities and be ready to seize them.

Do this and you will find that little by little you are using the Law of Attraction properly, and more and more good things will begin to appear in your life.

Saint Valentine

If you are reading this blog article on the day it was published, in many parts of the world today is Valentine's Day.  A day that celebrates romantic love.

The story behind St Valentine is shrouded in the mists of time.  There is even uncertainty about who this man was, with at least three different possible candidates.  But many believe he was a Roman Priest, cruelly executed in 269 AD by the emperor Claudius.  Those who believe this tell the following story about his "crime" and its link to romantic love.

Emperor Claudius issued an edict forbidding young people from marrying.  Why did he issue this edict?  Because he wanted all young people to be available to serve in his army, and he believed soldiers who were married and experienced true romantic love were much less likely to kill.  St Valentine believed that romantic love was a God-given emotion and that it was wrong to forbid young people to marry.  So he conducted weddings secretly, despite the edict expressly prohibiting this.  He was arrested for this "crime", and beaten, then stoned, and finally beheaded.  Before he died, he sent a note to the young lady he loved, the daughter of his jailor Asterius, and signed it "from your Valentine".

This is not the only story behind Valentine's Day, but to me it is the most powerful.  Is it true?  I really don't know, and nor does anyone else.  As I say, the story is lost in the mists of time and we can never be wholly certain which bits of it are true.  But it doesn't really matter.  Historical truth is important if you are trying to piece together exactly what happened and when, but the power of myths and legends does not rely on historical truth.  Their power is vested in the way they influence our beliefs and actions.

I truly believe that love reduces the capacity for violence.  Sometimes propaganda can distort our love for friends and family and make us believe that it is necessary to fight in a war in order to protect them.  But I believe, as did Claudius, that the overall effect of true love is to make it far more difficult for anyone to twist the way you think and feel and make you do anything designed to cause suffering.

Do you love anyone?  I really hope you do!  In fact, I hope you love everyone.  If you do, and you allow this love to influence you and determine the way you think and behave, this will have a very positive effect on you and on all around you.  This applies not only to romantic love, which is emphasized in the story of St Valentine, but also to a broader and more general love.

Epigenetics and Personal Development

When I studied biology at university in the 1970's there was a small but significant resurgence of belief by some geneticists in the theories of the French biologist Jean-Baptiste Lamarck.  This biologist developed an evolutionary theory well before Charles Darwin wrote "On the Origin of Species".  Lamarck believed that every organism develops during their lifetime characteristics that are useful to them, and that they pass on those characteristics to their offspring.  Darwin agreed with the first premise, that all organisms develop useful characteristics, but fundamentally disagreed that those characteristics could be passed on.

Lamarckian evolution as originally stated by Lamarck is no longer regarded as scientifically correct.  However, the concept that we can pass on to our children characteristics developed during our lifetime IS an accepted scientific fact.  Rather than Lamarckian Genetics this is referred to as Transgenerational Epigenetics.

This is not a blog on biological science, so why am I referring to the ability to pass on developed characteristics to our children?  For one very important reason.  If you join with me in believing you can pass on your non-inherited characteristics to your children you will want to ensure you give them the best possible start by ensuring you have worked hard on your own personal development.

Some people seem to think that working on their own personal development is a selfish activity, especially if they are spending money on it - money which could be used in other ways to help their family.  I want to reassure you that this is never the case.  It is always a very good thing to develop all the positive characteristics you can in yourself - and now you know that if you try to remove anything that is negative and improve anything that is positive you will be giving any children you may have a better start in life.

This is not, of course, restricted to epigenetic transmission.  It is also environmental.  Your children will recognize the positive aspects of your character and this will help them to develop positively themselves.  So it applies to children you already have, not just those who will be born in the future.

But what if you are no longer of child-bearing age, and your children are fully grown and developed?  Even then, this is still an important thing to do.  Adult children respect their parents, even if they don't always show that respect, and they can still learn from you.  And you can extend this even further - by developing positive traits yourself you can influence those around you, family, friends, and colleagues, to consider working on their own personal development.  Never underestimate the power of personal development to change the world around you.

Finally, you should note that just as you can pass on traits to your children, environmentally and epigenetically, so too you will have received such traits from your parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents.  Traits that may be hidden deep within.  Hopefully many of those traits will be positive, but not all will.  Some may have been appropriate many generations ago when they were first developed but are no longer so.  Use meditation, and other personal development techniques, to identify any traits within you that may no longer be helpful and to eliminate or modify them appropriately.