Tuesday, 29 September 2015

Motivation & the Law of Attraction

Many people try to put the Law of Attraction into practice and then complain it does not work.  In fact my experience suggests far more people have this experience than those who find it does work.  Why is this?  Is it that the whole idea of the Law of Attraction is wrong?  And what does this have to do with motivation anyway?

The answer is that there is nothing wrong with the Law of Attraction, but everything wrong with the way most people try to use it.  If you have not worked hard on pumping up your motivation it is a bit like trying to drive a car without putting any petrol in it.  If the tank is empty, the car will not move no matter how hard you press on the accelerator.  And if you do not have the right motivation, the Law of Attraction is unlikely to work properly for you no matter how often you repeat your affirmations and stare at your vision board.

Actually, you may feel that last sentence not quite correct, as staring at your vision board should start to build your motivation.  In my view that is its main purpose.  But I still stand by what I have said.  Many people don't get motivated when they use their vision boards.

If motivation is so important, how can you make sure you really have it?

Begin by looking at your goals and dreams.  Do they excite you?  Really excite you?

It is not enough simply to say "Yes! I really want that!".  Motivation goes much deeper than this.  When you look at a goal you want to achieve you should feel a state change.  There should be something deep within you that resonates with it.  There should be deep and powerful feelings about it.  If so, then you are motivated.  If not, then you have to do something about it, or you will probably not achieve the goal.

The first step is to find out whether this goal is fully aligned to your inner values.  If it is not, then it will be difficult for you to get really motivated.  My experience suggests that more than half the people who set out to achieve a goal are not really motivated to achieve it because it is not aligned to their inner values.

Do you even know what your inner values really are?

A good start to finding out is to take the goal and start day dreaming about it.  How does it make you feel?  What thoughts come into your mind?  Follow the trails of those thoughts and see where they lead.  You may be surprised where they end up, and this may give you a clue to who you really are and what it is you really want.

In many cases you will find you just need to tweak the goal slightly for it to be properly aligned with your inner values.  Time spent day dreaming to find out what those tweaks should be is not time wasted, but time properly invested.  If nothing exciting comes out of this, then you probably have completely the wrong goal, so look for another one that will excite you.

Now your goal is properly aligned, start to imagine how life will be when you have achieved that goal.  How does that make you feel?  This time you should feel the power.  You have now filled your tank with the right fuel, your motivation, and the engine is ready to respond.

If you have tried manifesting and using the Law of Attraction in the past and been disappointed by the lack of results, build your motivation in the way I have suggested here.  You will be blown away by the results!  Even if you find the Law of Attraction works for you, still use this technique to amplify your motivation and you will find it works even better.

Get motivated, and there is nothing in this world you cannot achieve!

Wednesday, 23 September 2015

What Does Success Mean?

If I asked you whether you want to be successful, I guess you would answer with a resounding "yes!"

But what exactly does success mean?  What is success?

This might seem like a question with an obvious answer.  But think again.  It is not obvious.

Let me ask it another way.  What does success mean to you?

That is the key question, and only you can answer it.  But I can perhaps put you on the right track to finding your own answer.

Almost certainly, success does not mean lots of money.  Money is only a tool which may allow you to do the things you want in life, and simply getting more money does not make you successful.

Let me explain this a little further.  When a client says "I want more money!" I probe deeper with the question "Why do you want more money?"  Maybe the answer is "I want to buy a luxury villa somewhere on a South Sea island!"  OK, already we are getting past "money" - we now have a villa.  The next question is "why do you want to buy a luxury villa somewhere on a South Sea island?"  My client may answer "I want to be able to holiday on a lovely South Sea island whenever I want!"  Well, that doesn't necessarily mean you have to buy the villa.  One of my colleagues who coaches people how to achieve anything they desire is a very wealthy lady.  She used to have a very similar phrase on her wish list.  As she is very good at doing what she coaches, and is an expert in manifestation, she soon acquired this villa.  But after owning it for a few years she realized it was not really what she wanted so she sold it.  Instead she manifested friends who owned such a villa and were happy for her to use it whenever she wished.  Now she had what she really wanted, but without the hassle and responsibility of the ownership of property.

I suggest in order to be in the best position to be really successful you ask yourself the right questions.  Find out what success really means to you, and then challenge yourself.  Think about what you have said and dig deeper.  Ask yourself why this represents success or whether there is really something underlying it that better defines success for you.  Until you do this you will not be trying to manifest the right things, and you will probably be disappointed in the results.  Don't blame the universe for this - it is your fault for not really digging deep and answering the question properly, "what does success mean to me?"

Asking yourself this question, "what does success mean to me", is absolutely key to becoming successful.  Spend some time right now defining it and be sure the answer you give is the right one (or rather, the right ones, as almost certainly there will be a number of answers).  If you do this you will really be on the right road to success.

Wednesday, 16 September 2015

Using Music to Ease Depression

Shakespeare wrote "If music be the food of love, play on".  Music can, indeed, be the food of love, and of every other emotion.  It also has great power, particularly through the use of emotions, to heal, improve relationships, improve your memory, study far more effectively, and help you grow and develop your personality.

Take depression for example.  Now before anyone thinks I am suggesting you avoid medical treatment, I am not.  Depression is a serious illness and therefore has to be taken seriously.  If you think you might be suffering from depression your first port of call should be a doctor.  But having said that, music can be used very effectively to help ease the symptoms of depression.  It is also a great way of dealing with a melancholic mood that may or may not be caused by depression.

How should you use music to help ease depression, or the blues?  You should create a playlist of appropriate tracks of music.  Begin the list with music which seems to match your depressive mood.  Melancholic, slow tunes.  Blues music would be a good start - or perhaps Fado or Enka if you are familiar with those styles.  If you enjoy classical music, then perhaps Beethoven's "Moonlight" Sonata, or Wagner's "Liebestod" from "Tristan and Isolde" would be appropriate.  The key is to use music you like, of whatever style, but which clearly matches your mood.

Believe it or not, just listening to this kind of music matching your mood can change your mood completely, hence the popularity of blues music for example.  But do not stop there!  The next step is to select some tracks that are more "mid tempo".  Ones that are a little faster and feel a little happier.  An example might be "Only the Lonely" by Roy Orbison, or Bach's "Air on a G-String".

From there, move to some more "up-beat" and happier pieces of music.  For example "Good Vibrations" by the Beach Boys, or "Für Elise"by Beethoven.

Finally, end your selection with some really joyful, faster tempo pieces.  "Fun, Fun, Fun" by the Beach Boys, "All You Need Is Love" by the Beatles, Sousa's "Stars and Stripes Forever", or the "Ode to Joy" from Beethoven's 9th Symphony (i.e. the final movement) all spring to mind.

When you play this selection, in that order, you will find it lifts your mood.  You should find yourself in a much happier state by the end.

Again I stress this is not a cure and is not intended as an alternative to medical advice when needed.  But it can certainly help alleviate symptoms of depression, and is certainly very powerful when you are simply feeling low and want to snap out of that mood.

Don't wait until you need to use this playlist.  Create it now, and then keep it ready for when you really need it.  If you wait until you need it you will find it much more difficult, and perhaps even impossible, to create it properly.

Make sure you use styles of music that you are comfortable with.  I have given examples of pop music from the 60's and traditional classical music, as these are styles I enjoy.  If you click on the title of each track I have suggested you will be able to obtain a copy if you do not already have it.  But you can equally use modern rock, punk, hip hop, new age, or anything that moves you.

The example I have given is just for lifting your mood, and it will do that in a very powerful way.  There is not enough space here to go through all the other ways you can use music in your personal development journey, although I may introduce some more in a future blog if enough people ask me to do so.  But you can see the technique I have used here, and can then modify it in order to create different playlists for different purposes.

If you are interested in pursuing this further, check out "The Tao of Music" by John Ortiz.  You can get a copy here.  Alternatively, if you are in the UK, try this link: UK Version.

Get going now and start using music to improve your mood!

Wednesday, 9 September 2015

Self Empowerment

If only ...!

Have you ever used those words?  I bet you have!

If only I could lose another few pounds!  If only I had more money!  If only [spouse name] would understand me better!  If only I could be more successful!  If only ...!

But did you realize that by saying "if only ..." in this way you are making it far less likely that whatever you are wishing for will happen?  "If only ..." tells your subconscious mind that you do not believe it is possible.  Your subconscious mind believes whatever you tell it, especially if there is emotion attached to what you say, and what your subconscious mind truly believes will come to pass.

When you say "if only I could lose another few pounds!" you are telling your subconscious that you have reached the limit of your slimming ability and it is not possible for you to lose any more weight, not even a single pound.  Your subconscious will note this and will ensure you do not lose any more weight.  You will now either stay the same weight or even put on a few more pounds.  Is that what you wanted to happen?  Of course not!

When you say "if only I had more money!" you are telling your subconscious that the amount of money you have in your bank right now (or at least the rolling average balance) is all you will ever have.  No matter what you try to do about it you will never be able to get any more.  Your subconscious will note this and will ensure you do not increase that balance except temporarily.  Either your rolling average will remain the same from now on or it will go even lower.  Is that what you wanted to happen?  I think not!

It gets even worse when your "if only ..." relates to people around you.  Not only do you give the wrong message to your own subconscious, but you also broadcast it to those people too, to their subconscious.  Now you have both your own subconcious and that of the people around you working against you.  How's that for setting yourself up for failure?

The biggest step you can take to self empowerment is to stop saying "if only ...!".  Wipe that phrase out of your vocabulary for good!  It does not exist!

It is so easy to turn it around.  Take "if only I could lose a few more pounds!"  Now wipe out "if only".  It changes into "I could lose a few more pounds" - much better!  As a second step, change that subjunctive tense of "could", which makes it a bit wishy washy and uncertain.  Some people change it into the future tense - "I will lose a few more pounds" - but you should instead say something which makes you feel as though you have already achieved this goal.  So "I have lost another four pounds!" would be a great way to modify this "if only".

Or "if only I had more money", becomes "I had more money", which then becomes "I have more money".  All you have to to now is quantify that statement with your monetary goal and you are there.

Everyone can use this self empowerment method, and it is very powerful indeed.  You don't even have to worry about what you need to focus on, as the "if only ..." phrases that try to emerge tell you where you can and should empower yourself.

From this moment on promise yourself you will never say "if only ..." ever again, or will only allow that phrase to appear fleetingly in order to determine what your next goal should be.  Do this and I have a promise for you - you will find your self empowerment has been ratched up enormously, which will make a tremendous difference in your life and the way you feel!

Wednesday, 2 September 2015

How to Improve Your Self Confidence

How self confident are you?  Do you believe you are capable of achieving anything you put your mind to, or are there lots of times you say "I am rubbish at that!"?

Let me begin by saying that no matter what you may think you ARE capable of achieving anything you put your mind to.  We all are.  You just have to, well, put your mind to it!

Let me also say that whenever you say "I am rubbish at that!", then you ARE rubbish at it.

Both points are absolutely true, even though they appear contradictory.

They are both true because of the enormous power we have within us.  Or perhaps I should say the infinite power we have within us - the power of the Universe.

We can use that power constructively or destructively, just as someone splitting the atom can use it to create electricity or to destroy cities the size of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

If you ever say "I am rubbish at ... " you will make yourself rubbish at it.

Perhaps one of the commonest uses of a phrase like that is "I am hopeless at remembering names!".  Have you ever said that?  If so, each time you say it you eat away at your ability to remember names until you really are hopeless.  To my shame I have said that more times than I would like to admit!  I never say it now, though, and am repairing the great damage I caused myself by saying it.

Recognize that if you keep telling yourself you are good at something, and really believe it as you say it, then you will become good at it.  That is the way to build your self confidence, as you can improve your ability in anything you wish just by telling yourself "I can!".

If you find your self confidence is very low I suggest you start this process in a small way.  If you begin the process by saying "I am a master at learning foreign languages" when you have always felt it was impossible to learn another language you might just find you are taking on too big a task at once.  So start with something smaller, affirm to yourself that you can do it, that you are really good at it, then work at that ability and you will see the improvement.  As you see the small improvements this will increase your overall self confidence and allow you to move on to bigger tasks.

And whatever you do, stop telling yourself you are no good at something or you cannot do something.  Maybe if you find it very difficult then avoid doing it if possible, but don't keep telling yourself you cannot do it.

Put these two techniques into practice and you will see an automatic improvement in your self confidence which will grow and grow every day.