Mind Games and Self-Sabotage - Getting Out of Your Own Way

by

Tao De Haas

While you have great potential waiting to be unleashed there is something opposing it that is even more powerful. It stops you from being successful; it prevents you from putting things into action, it hinders your chances of achieving those goals that are important to you. It is so powerful that it can even paralyse you. So what is it that prevents so many people from reaching their potential? What could be even more powerful than the desire to achieve your goals?

Excuse me, you're in my way!

There is 'someone' who wants to stand in the way of your progress, like an overzealous bouncer standing at the door blocking your path to the world of success and achievement. But rather than it being someone external, it is an aspect of you, a sub-personality. It is the part that sabotages you through playing mind games. It tells you to 'start tomorrow' to 'do it later'. It finds more urgent and important things to do than stepping onto your path to success. When it sees others getting on and achieving the things that are important to them, this part will come up with justifications as to why you are not, by letting you believe that you're not as talented, not as capable, not as smart etc. Whatever mind game this part plays, it is often very effective in stopping you from flourishing and being successful.

So what's this mind game?

So what is the game? The game is called self-sabotage. Like in the game of chess it is equivalent to the powerful King. When it comes to self-sabotage, procrastination is King. This King stands in the doorway that leads from intention to action. Just like the game of chess is a process, so is self-sabotage. It is a complex process already started in early childhood. Unfortunately this process is a game that pitches people against themselves. It pitches their desire and intention against their impulses and seduces them not into action, but into stagnation.

Emotional not logical

Perhaps that sounds illogical, and this process is exactly that. It is a process that is emotionally driven and not driven by logical consideration. For the part of the brain that is concerned with protecting you, it seems safer not to act but to 'stay safe' where you are right now. While this is most useful for survival we humans are not merely programmed to survive, we are also programmed to evolve.

This is a perfect dynamic for the mind playing games. The game plays out with the various parts of your brain vying with each other, competing to get your focus and attention; the survival part versus the thriving part. Of course whatever part you favor with the most attention and energy wins the game!

Don't give it power

Sabotage can only thrive when you give it power. You need to stop giving 'King Sabotage' your focus and attention. While at its core sabotage might be there to protect you, your courage, determination and desire needs to be greater. While protection based on fear often does a great job, in many cases it does its job too well standing in the way of your progress, your success and ultimately achieving the things you most want to achieve.

Feel the fear

The game can be most effective, the 'voices' can be convincing and seductive if you allow them to be; 'do it tomorrow, you are too tired today, 'wait till you feel more motivated', 'you won't be good at it', 'you will never really succeed' etc. The more you listen to these voices the more power you give them. It is not about not feeling trepidation or uncertainty, but as the saying goes; feel the fear and do it anyway!

Get out of your own way!

Remember Marden? Deep within us dwell slumbering powers; power that would astonish us, that we never dreamed of possessing: forces which revolutionize their lives if aroused and put into action.

You will be amazed at your own capabilities when you get out of your own way. You will automatically evolve, flourish and grow as this is what nature has programmed you to do. The part of you that has been programmed to excel will win over the part that will try to hold you back. There is a very simple principle I call the seed and brick principle. Once you remove a brick that lies on top of a seed it will grow, flourish and evolve. Then, all you need to do is make sure you 'water it' (by focussing on it) and keep the soil 'nourished' (through nourishing your mind with positive and encouraging thoughts) and weeding out negative and limiting thoughts by not giving power to them.

Get out of your own way. When you stop self-sabotage and procrastination in one area of your life it will positively affect all other aspects. There is nothing more satisfying than disempowering self-sabotage and procrastination through empowering yourself.

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