Mindstate

Positive or Negative?

What is your prevailing mindstate?  Is it primarily positive or negative?

I believe it is important to maintain a positive mindstate as much as possible, for three different reasons.

Firstly, I believe that everything that happens to me originates from within.  If I constantly think negative thoughts, negative things will happen to me.  In other words, I strongly believe in the Law of Attraction.  Whatever I focus on most will be attracted to me, be it good or bad.  Why attract bad things when, if you choose, you can attract good things instead?

Secondly, I believe my state of mind spreads to those around me.  You don't have to believe in magic (which, personally, I do anyway) or any of the "new thought" philosophies (again, I do), to believe you "infect" those around you with your moods.  Imagine being in a room of people who are all in a bad mood and are showing this, for example, through their facial expressions.  How does that make you feel?  I would be most surprised if it made you feel happy!  Wouldn't you want to get out of that room as quickly as possible so you didn't become miserable?  Now imagine being in a room where everyone is happy.  True, some people do react badly to this, so it is not quite as simple as it seems.  But as long as there is not something deep within you that resents the happiness (for example if you have just lost a loved one) you will probably find the happiness is infectious too.

Lastly, if you have the choice of being happy or sad, which would you choose?  Surely you would wish to be happy wouldn't you?  If you have a positive state of mind you are much more likely to be happy than sad.  Happiness is not something external but rather comes from inside you.  The things that happen to you do not, of themselves, make you happy or sad.  They may trigger a happy or sad state of mind, but the key word here is "trigger".  It is not what happens itself that causes you to be happy or sad, but your state of mind.  So why not choose to have a positive state of mind that makes you happy.

Realistic Optimism

Recently I heard a so-called expert on the radio assert that the "normal" mindstate of British people is pessimism.  He berated those who are optimistic and said they should just accept the "normal" pessimistic state of mind which is the heritage of the British.

Why?  I am British, and I certainly do not accept this point of view.  I do accept that many are pessimists, and this is not restricted to the British.  Indeed, some sales trainers tell us that the way to motivate British buyers is to get them to move away from the things they fear rather than towards the things they want.  That may be true, but it doesn't have to be.

We can choose to be optimistic if we wish.  By all means realistic, but still optimistic.  By "realistic" I mean not always so expecting the best outcome that we are shocked and disappointed when it doesn't happen.  But by "optimistic" I mean knowing that good things will happen, even if there are sometimes some less pleasant interludes on the way.  Be prepared for the worst, but expect the best!

Victim Mindset

Many people have what is called a "victim mindstate".  They are always asking "why does this happen to me?"  They view themselves as always being the victim of unfortunate circumstances.  If you believe you are a victim you will interpret everything that happens to you in this way.

Notice the choice of words here - "happens to you".  Victims have a grandiose sense of their own importance.  Everything that happens is something happening to them.  Not impersonal.  Not just one of those things.  But a part of a universal conspiracy to make them miserable.  They are the centre of the universe.  Not a kind universe but an evil, threatening universe.

Guess what?  If that is the way you think you will start attracting those bad situations to you.  Even when you are in a good situation, though, you will manage to find something bad within it.  You will find the elements that support your view that you are a victim.

If you are a victim, escaping from this mindset is not easy.  But it is something you must do unless you want to stay miserable all your life.

The universe is not conspiring against you.  It wants nothing more than to give you all the good things you want and deserve.  But as long as you keep asking it for the bad things (which is what you are doing when you fall into the trap of the victim mindstate) it will give them to you.  As it says in Matthew 7:7 - "Ask and it shall be given to you".  That applies just as much, unfortunately, to the bad things in life as well as the good things.

I Make It Happen

Most of us fall into the victim trap from time to time, even if we do not generally have the victim mindset personality.  When it happens to you do NOT ask the question "why me?", or you are in danger of falling deeper and deeper into the victim mindset.  Instead, ask an empowering question.  Ask "what can I do to ...." - and fill in the gap depending on the circumstances.  "What can I do to make more money?"  "What can I do to attract a lovely partner?"  "What can I do to be happier?".  I am sure you can add many more examples.  The universe always answers your questions eventually, so by asking such questions you will be finding the ways to a better life.

Move from the state of "it happens to me" (the victim state) to that of "I make it happen".  Ask the right questions, and then make it happen by following the answers to those questions.

It Happens Through Me

Ultimately, you can then move again from "it happens to me" to "it happens through me".  This is the state in which you are allowing universal power to flow through you and bring good things to those around you.  By doing this you will find you are doubly blessed.  You will certainly feel good being the instrument of the universe in bringing all that is good to others.  But also you will find that as you give, so you will receive.  This is a universal law which cannot be broken.

For most of us, our mindset is not a permanent fixture but a fluctuating state.  Sometimes most of us will fall into the victim mindset unless we notice it starting to happen and take action to reverse it.  Try as much as possible to be in the "it happens through me" mindset.

Don't be taken in by those around you who try to tell you it is silly to be optimistic and the more realistic state of mind is the pessimistic one.  This is only true if you let it be true.  Don't become a victim, but become the one who creates happiness all around and luxuriates in that happiness!

Optimistic Outlook

Why An Optimistic Outlook Will Make You Healthy, Wealthy and More Popular!

By:
Roger Elliott

You would think that headline is too big a claim to back up. Think again...

Optimism is a neglected topic. Since the advent of positive thinking, it has taken a back seat in personal development and therapy circles. But optimism is different to positive thinking, and what's more, learning how to do it buffers you against depression and anxiety and, unbelievably, makes you more likely to succeed in your chosen pursuits.

The trouble with optimism is that it is seen as something unchangeable. People tend to see themselves as either 'an optimist' or 'a pessimist', and these two extremes leave no room for anything in between.

In reality, you are an optimist to a degree, and this degree changes in different situations. What's more, you can deliberately alter the way you think to increase your optimism quotient. But why should you?

The Benefits of Optimism

In one study of elderly people, their perception of their own health was found to be more important in longevity than their actual health.

This article cites research that shows:

i) the immune systems of pessimists function less well than those of optimists

ii) optimists have greater life expectancy than pessimists.

And if that's not enough for you, how about this:

People like optimists more than they do pessimists.

How do we know that? Well aside from common sense that says we like to be around people that make us feel good - (your friend telling you "Everything's ruined and it's going to get worse" doesn't usually improve your day!) - here's an astounding bit of research...

In his book 'Learned Optimism', Martin Seligman talks about the research he and his team did into the optimism levels of American Presidents. 27 out of 29 winners of the presidential race were graded as more optimistic than their unsuccessful running opponent. I think we need say no more.

And on the subject of money, success and all that, consider these quotations:

"Success is 99% failure"

Soichiro Honda

"Genius is one percent inspiration, and ninety-nine percent perspiration."

Thomas Alva Edison

Pessimists give up more easily than optimists - after all, what's the point continuing with something if you think it will fail? Strong optimists press on and on, until they arrive at the place they 'knew' they would reach eventually - success. Or die trying.

Optimism in the Face of Adversity

The times when optimism really pays off are when you are faced with a life problem, challenge or setback. An optimistic thinking style at these times will increase your resilience, maintain hope and improve your chances of a successful or acceptable outcome.

Pessimism will tend to make you feel more anxious, depressed and hopeless, none of which will help you overcome obstacles, deal with tough situations or persevere with difficult projects.

"I'm not a pessimist, I'm a realist."

Apart from the endless, moebius-like philosophical debate on reality that could be entered into at this point, there is another, much more pertinent reason why optimism beats pessimism any day.

There is some research to show that pessimists have a more accurate take on some situations than optimists. But not the sort of situations that really matter.

In a study of students after an exam, those who were shown to have a pessimistic thinking style guessed their performance more accurately than the optimists. All well and good.

But what about the ambiguous situation presented by a relationship difficulty for example? While the pessimist might have a more 'accurate' take on the reality of the situation, the optimist will tend to persevere, and so is much more likely to overcome the problem.

The pessimist is more likely to give up early. So who is better off? Well, as long as you think relationships are worthwhile (and you'd have to be a major pessimist to think they are not), the optimist of course!

And this applies in all sorts of uncertain situations - the stuff of which life is made.

Usefulness, not Accuracy

The thing is, optimism is simply much more useful than pessimism in the sphere of emotions, relationships and life in general. As mentioned above, learning optimism makes life more enjoyable. Period.

Optimism tends to engender pleasant emotions, while pessimism creates unpleasant ones. And that, in essence, makes for an enjoyable life.

At least I think it does.

Article by Roger Elliott, confirmed optimist.