Daydreams

Is there a place in your life for daydreaming?  Should there be?

I believe the answer is a very firm "yes"!

"Daydream" time is your opportunity to explore what it is you really want in life.  Most of us are so busy trying to get somewhere that we have never stopped and thought whether or not that is where we really want to be!  We also often "borrow" other people's ideas about what we should want.  Perhaps we have goals that were originally set by our parents.  Or that we have read about or heard friends discuss and think they should be our goals too.  Perhaps they should!  But also, perhaps not!  Or maybe we should retain those goals but there are other goals out there that really should have our name on, but that we have simply never considered.  So one reason to daydream is to allow new possible goals to arise and then to try them out and test them, see whether they fit.

You may already believe strongly in the power of visualization and practise this whenever you can.  Certainly this is a very good thing, and in a few days' time you may be reading an e-mail from me about visualization and distinguishing it from daydreaming.  I certainly encourage you to visualize and to do so powerfully.  But visualization is a very clear and directed process.  It is not the same as daydreaming.  When you visualize you already know very clearly what it is you want to achieve and that is what you focus on.  But when you daydream you are in a much freer state than when you visualize, and the purpose is quite different.  It is a time when you should completely let go and stop trying to control everything.  Allow the daydream to take over.  Just relax and let it flow.

After the daydream is over you can then analyze it.  How did it make you feel?  Did it introduce anything that you haven't previously considered?  Should you now consider that element or those elements?  I suggest you keep a daydream diary.  Record the results in that diary.  Then, from time to time get a bigger overall picture by reflecting on a number of different daydream sessions.

Try to create a habit of daydreaming.  This is easiest done if you try to do it at a similar time on a regular basis.

How often should you daydream?

This is a big question.  I suggest the answer will vary depending on where you are in your life right now.  If you have a lot you need to do and are under a lot of pressure then perhaps a daily practice would be too much.  But even if you are under pressure try to have a daydream session at least once a week.

How open should you be about spending time daydreaming?

Unless you are very lucky you will probably find even your closest loved ones may not understand why you need to daydream and may try to convince you not to "waste time" doing it.  It is probably easier simply to daydream when you can be by yourself and when nobody else will know that is what you are doing.  Maybe just say you are going to take a brief nap.  That is not really a lie, as it is more or less a kind of nap.  Your loved ones will probably believe you are tired and are having a nap to recover, but you haven't told them this, they have simply assumed it, so there are no untruths here.

Go on!  Try it!  Spend some time daydreaming.  You will find you should emerge from these sessions feeling more refreshed and energized, as well as quite possibly discovering something new and important about yourself and some of your hidden desires.

Unseeing and Unhearing

Have you ever sat in front of your television watching a film and then suddenly realized you haven't taken in anything that happened over the past half hour?

Have you ever been reading a book and then suddendly realized you have been turning the pages but not really read anything?

Probably in most of those cases it was because you were half asleep.  But not always.  Sometimes it is because you have focused on something else.  Perhaps something important you have been working on.

Or here is one probably the male partner of a couple will recognize.  Has your partner ever been in conversation with you, got some standard grunts and vague answers from you, but you didn't really hear anything she said - or perhaps didn't even really notice she was talking to you at all?

Recently I just finished reading a "weird fiction" novel called "City and City" in which two cities are intertwined and the residents of one city have to "unsee" and "unhear" the residents of the other city.  Maybe you have read this too.

Why do I mention this?

Because unfortunately it is all too common for each of us to "unsee" and "unhear" things.  It is all too common for us not to notice what is going on around us.  We become so focused on our own problems, on what it is we want to achieve, that we miss all the signals around us which, if we only took the time and trouble to look and listen, would actually get us where we want to go far quicker than any of the strategies we can come up with by ourselves.

Different people call those signals different things.  I call them intuition.

You have probably learned since an early age to "unsee" and "unhear" those intuitive signals, just like the residents of Besźel and Ul Qoma in China Miéville's novel "City and City" have learned to "unsee" and "unhear" the residents of the other city.

Probably at some point in your childhood someone told you to "stop dreaming".  Probably they told you that you have to use logic to find answers to your problems.  And so that is what you have done ever since.

The answers are out there waiting for you to see them, which you can do most easily by daydreaming, and which you can do simply by stopping this "unseeing" and "unhearing" that is ingrained in you and that society regards as "normal".

Now is the time to stop "unseeing" and "unhearing".  Take some time every day to sit quietly and listen to the intuitive voice within you.  See what that inner being wants to show you.

The first time you do this you will probably not see or hear anything.  Only a voice telling you not to be so silly and to get on with your work!  Not just the first time, in fact, but probably many times.  You have a lifetime of "unseeing" and "unhearing" to reverse.  So be patient.  Don't expect immediate results.  But also be ready for any results that may come.  Sit quietly and allow your intuition to get to work.  Daydream, and see where you are taken in your dream.  This is not a waste of time at all, but a very good use of time.  A way to use your intuitive side rather than just your logical side.

Take back your natural intuitive power.  The power that was stolen from you by people telling you not to daydream.  The power that can provide all the answers you need to achieve whatever you want to achieve!

Do You Dream?

Do you dream?  I certainly hope so, for several reasons.  If not, you are missing out - again for several reasons.

What do I mean by dreaming?

There are at least two very different types, and possibly three depending on how wide you define them.

Most people who are asked the question "do you dream?" immediately think about what happens when they are asleep.  Dreaming while you sleep performs an important function.  According to Dr Rosalind Carter, the founder of the Sleep Disorder Service and Research Centre in Chicago, dreams "help us process new, emotionally important information and add it to our conceptual memory system.  As I pointed out in an earlier article, scientists have discovered that most mammals (and perhaps all) use this process while they sleep to experiment and sort out which strategies should work and which probably won't.  We are no exception to this principle.  Dreams are a safe "sandbox" we can use to try out different things, to see how we might react emotionally to changed circumstances, to condition ourselves to and be ready to accept change.

If you believe you do not dream while asleep you are probably wrong.  There have been a number of scientific studies of the "non-dreaming" phenomenon, and most have reached the conclusion that those who claim not to dream simply do not remember their dreams when they wake up.  You probably still gain the benefits of your dreams, as your subconscious will have integrated the experience whether or not you remember it.

One way to begin recalling your dreams is to have a pen and paper by your bedside and to write down anything you can remember about your dreams the moment you wake up.  I can hear your objection loud and clear - how can I write down anything about my dreams if I don't remember them?  Humour me and try it anyway.  Many people still have a memory of their dreams when they first wake, but within just a few seconds completely forget they even had any dreams.  Those people adamantly state that they never dream, but if they try recording their dreams the moment they wake they find they really did dream.

Dreams don't just occur when we are sleeping though.  We also daydream.  You can think of a daydream as being very similar to a dream while you are asleep, and it can fulfil the same function.  As long as it is done appropriately this is a very good thing.  Clearly you should not daydream when driving a car or operating heavy machinery!  It may also not be appropriate to daydream when you are being paid to work or in the middle of a school lesson, or a college or university lecture!  On the other hand, sometimes in such cases a daydream can be very creative and help you do a better job or get a better grip on the subject you are studying.  Just don't expect your boss, teacher or lecturer to agree unless they are very open minded!

If you don't already daydream I encourage you to do so.  Choose an appropriate time to do this, ideally when you are on your own and will not be disturbed.  As with the technique to recall night dreams, have a pen and paper by you so that immediately after your daydream session you can note down anything that appeals, or any insights you may have had.

There is another meaning of "dream", of course.  Your hopes and wishes for the future.  To some people this is akin to daydreaming, and they believe it is enjoying an esperience they will never have in the "real" world.  This is a very shortsighted view.  The distinction between the imaginary and real worlds is nowhere near as great as you may believe.  When you dream in the "imaginary" world you are actually starting to bring those dreams closer to what most people define as "reality".

This meaning of "dream" is very important.  We should all have dreams.  We should all have something we truly wish to achieve, and the start of the journey that ends in achievement is a dream.

In 1963 a great American stated "I have a dream!"  The dream he had has not yet fully come to pass, but the America of today is certainly very much closer to Martin Luther King's dream just over 50 years ago.  Some may argue that this would have happened even if King had not had that dream.  Probably that is true, but only because the same dream would have passed through another person equally empassioned by it.  I truly believe the world is a better place as a direct result of that dream.

So I hope you DO dream!  I hope you dream for a better future for yourself but also for all around you.  If you do, then the world will be a better place simply because you chose to dream!

Motivation & the Law of Attraction

Many people try to put the Law of Attraction into practice and then complain it does not work.  In fact my experience suggests far more people have this experience than those who find it does work.  Why is this?  Is it that the whole idea of the Law of Attraction is wrong?  And what does this have to do with motivation anyway?

The answer is that there is nothing wrong with the Law of Attraction, but everything wrong with the way most people try to use it.  If you have not worked hard on pumping up your motivation it is a bit like trying to drive a car without putting any petrol in it.  If the tank is empty, the car will not move no matter how hard you press on the accelerator.  And if you do not have the right motivation, the Law of Attraction is unlikely to work properly for you no matter how often you repeat your affirmations and stare at your vision board.

Actually, you may feel that last sentence not quite correct, as staring at your vision board should start to build your motivation.  In my view that is its main purpose.  But I still stand by what I have said.  Many people don't get motivated when they use their vision boards.

If motivation is so important, how can you make sure you really have it?

Begin by looking at your goals and dreams.  Do they excite you?  Really excite you?

It is not enough simply to say "Yes! I really want that!".  Motivation goes much deeper than this.  When you look at a goal you want to achieve you should feel a state change.  There should be something deep within you that resonates with it.  There should be deep and powerful feelings about it.  If so, then you are motivated.  If not, then you have to do something about it, or you will probably not achieve the goal.

The first step is to find out whether this goal is fully aligned to your inner values.  If it is not, then it will be difficult for you to get really motivated.  My experience suggests that more than half the people who set out to achieve a goal are not really motivated to achieve it because it is not aligned to their inner values.

Do you even know what your inner values really are?

A good start to finding out is to take the goal and start day dreaming about it.  How does it make you feel?  What thoughts come into your mind?  Follow the trails of those thoughts and see where they lead.  You may be surprised where they end up, and this may give you a clue to who you really are and what it is you really want.

In many cases you will find you just need to tweak the goal slightly for it to be properly aligned with your inner values.  Time spent day dreaming to find out what those tweaks should be is not time wasted, but time properly invested.  If nothing exciting comes out of this, then you probably have completely the wrong goal, so look for another one that will excite you.

Now your goal is properly aligned, start to imagine how life will be when you have achieved that goal.  How does that make you feel?  This time you should feel the power.  You have now filled your tank with the right fuel, your motivation, and the engine is ready to respond.

If you have tried manifesting and using the Law of Attraction in the past and been disappointed by the lack of results, build your motivation in the way I have suggested here.  You will be blown away by the results!  Even if you find the Law of Attraction works for you, still use this technique to amplify your motivation and you will find it works even better.

Get motivated, and there is nothing in this world you cannot achieve!

Motivate Me!

How powerful is your motivation?  How easily can you pump your motivation up when you really need it?

I am sure you understand the need for motivation.  If you are trying to lose weight you know it is pretty much impossible unless you are highly motivated to lose it.  Without that powerful motivation you will always be tempted by the food and snacks you know you shouldn't eat.  Without that powerful motivation you will always find an excuse not to do your workout today.  Whatever it is you are trying to achieve, motivation is usually one of the keys to success.

If motivation is a key to success, what can you do to pump it up?

The answer I have found is to daydream.  Yes, you read that right - daydream!  I put myself in the position I will be in when I have achieved my goal.  Put myself there and really feel what it is like.  Not just for a few seconds, which is how some people pay lip service to this concept, but for as long as it takes to feel a real change in my thinking, emotions, and even my body.

You do need to prepare for this daydream though, otherwise you may find it goes nowhere.  So the first thing you should do is start to list all the advantages of achieving your goal.  Make this list as wide and extensive as you can.  See if you can produce 100 reasons why you want to achieve it.  That is probably a very tough target, but keep working at it.  You will probably find the first dozen or so ideas come quickly, but then they peter out.  Don't give up at that point, as you will also probably find some pretty powerful reasons in the later batches, and they may be the very reasons that will motivate you.  Those later reasons will probably be less directly connected to your achievement than the earlier ones, but that is ok as long as there is a link.  Keep going and find those really powerful reasons for achieving your goal.  Then you can have your daydream.

Keep repeating this process.  Add more reasons to your list.  Add pictures which illustrate the great changes in your life that will appear when you achieve your goal.  And keep dreaming.

Which goals should you use this process with?  Ideally with all your goals.  But you will find the greatest motivation will come when you use it with your long term goals, the ones that might seem impossible to your friends and family if you shared them.  Your short term and medium term goals are steps along the route to your long term goals, so motivate yourself by daydreaming about your life when you have achieved those long term goals and then remind yourself that achieving those small goals will get you closer to your dream.

You will not necessarily find you are highly motivated the first time you try this exercise.  You may have a long history of poor motivation to counter.  But try it for a few weeks and I am sure you will be astounded by the difference it makes.  When you have established it as a habit you will find it much easier to continue it, not just for the initial goals you used it for but for new goals you set yourself.  You will reach the point where the moment you set yourself a new goal you immediately feel the glow that comes with achieving it, and you will instantly be motivated to do whatever it may take to get there.

What will motivate me?

Work at this daydreaming exercise and I know that will motivate you!

Goals and Dreams

Do you have any goals?  Not just dreams, but real goals?

You should actually have both.  As Napoleon Hill said, a goal is a dream with a deadline.  The starting point is therefore a dream.  You must always dream, or eventually you will run out of goals.

Some people feel that dreaming is a waste of time and energy.  The term "daydream" is used more often than not as a criticism.  But dreaming is most definitely NOT a waste of time and energy, it is something you must keep doing.  Not all the time, of course!  You don't want to spend all your time just dreaming, or you will never achieve anything.  But make sure you spend enough time dreaming to have a good supply of goals to achieve, or you will again never achieve anything.  You need to have the right balance between the two.

In my experience far too many people leave out this first step.  As a result they find they have no real goals, and wonder why life seems to have become more of a "grind" than a joyful experience.

Having dreams is a creative activity.  Turning those dreams into goals is a practical activity.  To use "Right Brain - Left Brain" terminology, the start of the process, having dreams, is a "Right Brain" activity and turning dreams into goals is a "Left Brain" activity.  You should be aware, though, that the concept of your right and left hemispheres of your brain having radically different functions is regarded by psychologists as a myth.  Psychologists say that both hemispheres work together to achieve most tasks. But perhaps another way of looking at that is the same as I am saying here - you NEED both hemispheres to be working together; you NEED both the creativity and practicality.

If you sometimes find life a bit boring I suggest you start by checking to see if you have forgotten to keep dreaming.  If you have, that is your problem.  Start creating those dreams again.  Don't worry about the fact that you cannot yet see how some of those dreams will be achieved.  Give the Universe more credit than that.  It has enormous power and that power can be harnessed to turn your dreams into reality - but only if you have those dreams in the first place!

Getting in touch with your inner child that wants to keep dreaming is therefore an extremely important step.  Don't allow the adult in your to squash that inner child!

Once you have made sure the flow of dreams is there you can move on to the next step - turning some of them into goals.  Notice I have said "some of them".  Do not try to turn them all into goals!  That is actually one way of eventually turning off the flow of dreams.  You will find many dreams cannot yet be turned into goals, and unless you watch what is happening carefully the "adult" in you will react by telling the "child" in you to stop producing dreams it cannot turn into reality.  The "child" will then follow those instructions, and the wonderful flow of dreams will diminish and eventually stop altogether.  But some of them MUST be turned into goals if you are ever going to achieve anything.  Turn them into goals by selecting the ones that most resonate with you and try to create some deadlines.  Those deadlines may be far in the future.  If they are, break down the dreams into smaller tasks which lead to achieving the ultimate dream, and apply deadlines for the first steps.

There is plenty of help online which you can tap into in order to follow both of these principles - dream more, and create more goals.  Make sure you DO tap into it, and your life will be far more exciting and far more productive.

Be and Do What You Love!

I want you to take a few moments right now to daydream.  If you don't have the time right now, please don't read ahead but instead book some time in your diary when you will do this.  At least 5 or 10 minutes, or maybe a little more, when you know you will be uninterrupted and will not start worrying about something else you need to get ready to do.

Ok, are you ready?  Then let's begin.

What do you love doing the most?  Think carefully about this.  Don't just give a throwaway answer.  Don't give an answer you think someone else might want to hear.  You are safe!  Nobody else is listening.  Not your mother or father, not your spouse, not your priest, not your teacher or coach.  Nobody but you.  So be very honest here.  What do you really love doing?  Focus on it now.  Imagine you are doing it right now.  How does it make you feel?  Hold that feeling.

A different question.  If you could be anyone in the world, who would that be?  What is it about them that you would really love to have as a part of you?  Now expand on this.  Imagine you could create a completely new character by taking the very best from other role models.  Maybe people around you.  Maybe people you have read about or seen on TV or in films.  By "the very best", again I don't mean what you think you should regard as the best.  I mean aspects of that person you would really love if those aspects were a part of you.  Of your personality.  Of your mind.  Of your body.  And of your spirit.  Focus on this newly created being right now.  Imagine YOU are this lovely person.  How do you feel now?

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?  Why?  What is it that you really love about the idea of living there?  This doesn't have to be somewhere you have been.  It could be simply the kind of place you have imagined, whether or not it is a real place.  What is around you right now as you slip into this lovely place?  Try to visualize everything that is there, all the things that make it perfect for you, that make you so love being there.  Let the feeling of being there fill you with energy and fill you with love.

How about your perfect relationship?  How does that feel?  It may be your relationship with your current partner, but something about it has changed so that the love between you is magnified many times over.  Or perhaps it is a relationship with someone you have not yet met.  Let the love in that relationship fill your being.

Ok, you have finished your daydream.  For the moment.  But what I am now going to suggest is that this is a serious exercise, and not simply a daydream, which you should repeat often.  Do it when you wake in the morning.  Do it when you slip into bed at night.  Do it at odd moments during the day.  Why?  Because what you are doing is creating your dream reality.  A reality which you really can manifest and turn into a dream life that has come true for you.

What you have just learned how to do is perhaps the most difficult step of all in learning to manifest, in putting into action the Law of Attraction.  Everything you want to achieve, you really can achieve - but first you have to want it so much it becomes a burning desire.  You have to really love everything about what it is you are trying to achieve.  Do this and your dreams really can come true!

If you want to learn how to take this to the next stage, listen to this "Dream Builder" webinar:

http://lifemasteryinstitute.com/go/aff.php?p=arcoh&w=DBPWEBINAR