Everyone Makes Mistakes

Greeting and Salutations from Ari Mc Intyre!

I have been getting positive feedback from the last article so I wanted to continue with my next statement "everyone makes mistakes."  This is so near and dear to me as a Spiritual Life Coach.  We learn with challenges. Notice what I am saying: "With" challenges.  The only way we grow is with a situation that requires us to be the best we can be.

Most days I am researching, developing and listening to feedback from my Spiritual Coaching clients about what is working for them and what is not.  So when I say to you everyone makes mistakes I am speaking from experience.

You are your own worst enemy.  You will find faults where others would not even dare to look.

Why?

Because we need to learn how to trust, believe and support ourselves and others in our lives.  We are all connected whether you want to entertain that idea or not.  It's important to accept and understand that from the beginning so you can learn how you deal with life challenges.  Knowing yourself helps you to laugh at yourself and not take yourself so seriously.

You see, life is what we make it.  A part of life is making choices which can lead to mistakes.  This doesn't mean we will always make bad choices or keep making the same mistakes.  Knowing yourself is the key to not allowing every setback, every challenge and every bad turn of event make you shut down and stop trying to achieve your goals.

In my coaching I have seen many of my clients move from being average, everyday people to folks who are now running very successful businesses.  How did that happen?  By making a lot of mistakes and a lot of decisions.  That is how!

No-one can hurt you or help you more than yourself.

Here is an affirmation that has help me over the years to stay on the right path for me:

I, (state your full name) forgive myself for making bad choices.  I let go and let my higher power now guide me to my true path.  Under Grace in the Perfect Way!  And so it is!

I would suggest you light a Lemon Verbena Communications candle when you make this affirmation so you can set the stage for a relaxing mind set.

This is a really good affirmation.  Try saying it over and over again and you will see significant changes in your life.

Learning how to forgive yourself is the key.  Recognizing you have made poor decisions is hard, but the right affirmation, aromatherapy and lots of love can help you grow into the person you would like to be.  I have seen remarkable changes in people who do this.

Here are some suggestions on ways you can reduce the mistakes you make:

1. Slow down.  Take a few moments to think carefully about what you are doing so you can be more certain you are not making a mistake.
2. Talk to a trusted person.  It is always good to speak with someone who knows you and believes in what you are doing.
3. Do a Pro and Con list before you make your final choice.

Making mistakes is a part of life.  Don't let your choices rule you.  Make informed decisions so you can continue till your reach your goals.

Please check out my website and if you have any questions, comments or suggestions please email me at candlesbyari@gmail.com.

Love and Light

Ari

Who is Ari Mc Intyre?

Ari Mc Intyre is a Spiritual Life Coach with a successful live weekly radio show (Spiritual Coaching with Ari Mac) that is carried by I Heart radio, a maker of affirmation aromatherapy candles, and a writer.

She has been working as Spiritual Life Coach for over 15 years.

Ari uses her gifts of intuition and clarity to tune into an individual's situation and assist them to make better choices.  Ari facilitates these changes utilizing affirmation aromatherapy candles, spiritual coaching and keen observation with her expertise in the study of human nature, reading astrology charts and tarot cards and using energy healing to help each individual achieve their goal.  She has successfully guided her clients from being single to marriage, through life changing career moves, processing grief and manifesting dreams with counsel and divine guidance.  Ari says that FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real and that is why we all need a little positive energy in our lives.

Ari uses affirmation aromatherapy candles to help a person tune into their higher power.  Once you have achieved what you want, you have to maintain it with daily meditation & prayers.  Acquiring something is one thing but maintaining it is entirely different.

Her goal is to help you learn how to control your balance, think clearly and make smart choices to help maintain that balance.  Her acute sense of human nature makes working with Ari a truly enjoyable experience.

Ari believes God has a sense of humor, which is why sometimes things are so ironic.  It's not funny when it's happening but when it's done, if you look back on it, you may find an ironic divine path that you never knew existed.

No one is perfect but we can all do a little better each day.

Forgiveness

Has anyone ever said or done anything unforgiveable to you?  Something so awful you know you can never forgive them?

Probably this strikes a bell with most of my readers.  It would certainly be rare to find someone who has never been mistreated, never misunderstood, never abused in one way or another.  In some cases the abuse may have been particularly nasty.  Something you would much rather forget, but find you cannot.

Does this person deserve your forgiveness?  Probably not.  Should you forgive them?  Absolutely!

Why do I say this?  If they don't deserve your forgiveness, why should you forgive them?  Am I trying to turn you into a saint or something?

No.  I am not saying this to make you a "goody goody".  And I am certainly not suggesting you should allow anyone to take advantage of you.  So why I am saying it?

The reason is that I believe you deserve to be free.  You deserve to be happy.  You deserve to be able to do whatever you wish in life and not be weighed down carrying a load dumped on you by someone else.

If there is anyone you have not forgiven for what they have done or said to you this means you are allowing that person to control your life.  You are giving them the ultimate victory over you.  Is that what you want?  If not, you simply have to find a way to forgive them.

Some of you may now be saying "it's all very well for you to say that, but you don't know how I have suffered!  You cannot understand just how bad this was!"

I agree I cannot know what it is like to suffer in the way you may have suffered.  To use a common Christian saying, we each have our own cross to bear.  The one you are bearing may be far heavier than mine.  But even though I cannot understand just how bad it was for you, what I do understand is that you are now carrying an unnecessary burden.  Just like "Christian" in John Bunyan's "Pilgrim's Progress".  Christian was carrying a burden so heavy he could hardly move.  So are you if there is someone you have not forgiven.  Your happiness is marred because every so often you think of this unforgiveable thing that was done to you and it spoils what would otherwise be a lovely moment in a lovely day.  Why not simply throw that burden away?  It is not stuck to you with superglue.  You have chosen to carry it.  Now you should choose to throw it away.

There may be others who will say "but there is nobody I haven't forgiven!  Nobody has done anything particularly bad to me!"  If so, you are very fortunate!  But I would suggest there are probably some slights, some grievances, some humiliations that your conscious mind has forgotten but are still bubbling away somewhere under the surface.  You do not feel desparately unhappy, but because there are some unforgiven words and actions loitering in your unconsious mind what could be a really happy moment is, instead, just mildly pleasant.  These unforgiven things are stopping you reaching your full potential.  They are controlling you.

Would you like to free yourself of this burden?  Great!

The first thing you must do is find all the actions and words you have not yet forgiven.  Some may be easy to find.  Others will be hiding under the surface.  Sit quietly and let them come to you.

Now, for each unforgiven act or word find the person.  Picture that person in your mind.  Say to them "I forgive you".  At first you will probably feel silly. But don't worry about that.  Nobody is watching you.  Nobody is laughing at you.  This is something you are doing for yourself so you can be happier.

As you do this you will find a part of your mind will tell you that this person does not deserve your forgiveness.  You can immediately dispel that thought by saying "they may not deserve it, but I am forgiving them for me, not for them!"  This other part of your mind may say it was totally wrong of them to do this to you.  Respond by saying "I am not the one who will judge them for it, and I am not asking them or anyone else to do this again to me, I am just letting go so this act no longer controls me.  I forgive!"

If you are a Christian you should remember the phrase in the Lord's Prayer "Forgive me my wrongdoings as I forgive those who have done wrong to me"?  Whether or not you are a Christian this is a phrase I would like you to remember and use.  When you forgive others you will find that forgiveness of yourself comes quite naturally too.  But give it a helping hand anyway.  Add your own wrongdoings now.  See them clearly and then forgive yourself.  As long as you have forgiven others you should find you are now able to forgive yourself.  When you do you really should find you feel light and bouyant.  You have let go of your burden.

Try to perform this act of forgiveness every day.  I suggest you do it last thing at night before you go to sleep, as you should find your sleep will then be that much more refreshing.  Try it, let go, don't allow anyone to control you any more and see just how much difference this makes in your life!

How to Let Go: The 4 People You Must Forgive

by

Brian Tracy

There are four people you need to forgive if you are serious about changing your life and learning how to live in the now.

The first are your parents, living or dead. You must absolutely forgive them for every mistake they ever made in bringing you up. At the very least, you should be grateful to them for giving you life. They got you here. If you are happy to be alive, you can forgive them for everything else. Never complain about them again.

Many of my seminar participants have phoned or visited their parents and told them that they forgive them for everything. Often this simple act of courage and character has had a profound effect on their relationship with their mother or father. From that day onward, they have become good friends, which lasted the rest of their lives together.

On the other hand, by not forgiving your parents, you remain forever a child. You block your own chance to grow up and become a fully functioning adult. You continue to see yourself as a victim. Even worse, you keep your negative feelings of inferiority and anger alive. If your parents die without your having forgiven them, it can bother you for the rest of your life.

The second person or persons you must forgive are the people from your marriages or relationships that didn’t work out. These intimate relationships can be so intense, and so threatening to your feelings of self-esteem and self-worth, that you can be angry and unforgiving toward those people for years.

But you were at least partially responsible. Have the personal strength and integrity to say, “I am responsible,” and then forgive the other person and let him or her go. Say the words, “I forgive him/her for everything and I wish him/her well.” Each time you repeat this, the negative emotion attached to the memory will diminish. Soon it will be gone forever.

Many of my graduates have found that “the letter” is the key to putting a bad relationship behind them forever. This is a powerful technique that can free you from feelings of anger and resentment almost instantly.

Here is how it works: You to sit down and write the other person a letter of forgiveness. It consists of three parts.

First you say, “I forgive you for everything you ever did that hurt me.”

Second, you write out a description or list of every single thing that you are still mad about. Some people write several pages in this part.

Third, you end the letter with the words, “I wish you well.”

You then take the letter to the mailbox and drop it in. At that moment, you will feel a huge sense of relief, and you will be free at last.

By the way, don’t worry about how the other person might react. That is not your concern. Your goal is to free yourself, to regain your peace of mind, and to get on with the wonderful life that lies ahead of you.

The third person you must forgive is everyone else in your life who has ever hurt you in any way. Let them go. Forgive every boss, business partner, friend, crook or betrayer who has ever caused you grief of any kind. Clean the slate and forgive to forget. Wipe each of their names and images off by saying, “I forgive him/her for everything, and I wish him/her well.” Repeat this statement each time you think of the person or situation until the negative feelings are gone.

The fourth and final person you have to forgive is yourself. You must absolutely forgive yourself for every silly, senseless, wicked, brainless, thoughtless or cruel thing you have ever done or said. Stop carrying these past mistakes around with you. That was then and this is now.

Think of it this way. When you did those things in the past that you still feel badly about, you were not the person you are today. At that time, you were a different person, younger and less experienced. You were not your true self. You were an immature version of the person you have become with experience. Stop beating yourself up for something that occurred in the past that you cannot change.

Just say, “I forgive myself for every mistake I ever made. I am a thoroughly good person and I am going to have a wonderful future.” Whenever you think of that event or situation, just repeat, “I forgive myself completely.” And then get on with your life. Focus on the future rather than the past and don’t look back. Look at where you are going rather than where you have been.

Finally, if you did something that hurt someone, and you still feel badly about it, you can go to that person, or write, and apologize. Tell the person you are sorry for what you did or said. Whatever his or her reaction, positive or negative, it doesn’t matter. The very act of repentance, of expressing regret, will set you free.

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