Why should I think positively?

"What is all this nonsense about a positive attitude?  Why should I think positively?  If I think positive, and then the worst case happens, I will feel even worse than if I had just accepted everything would go wrong in the first place!"

Does this have a familiar ring?  I hope not to be honest, but I realize there are many people out there who feel exactly this way.  The "glass half empty" people.

Even if this is not your normal way of thinking you are probably tempted to sink into this feeling from time to time.  Especially when you seem to be going through one crisis after another.  At times like this you are probably tempted to thump the first person who tries to cheer you up with positive thinking stories!  Fortunately I am not close to hand, so if you are feeling this way now I am safe!

There are, of course, some very good reasons indeed why you must think positively.

The first reason I want to give is that if you think positively you are far more likely to find the right answer to whatever problem may confront you.  You will be telling your subconscious mind that you know there is an answer and it will therefore start looking for that answer.  The reality is that there always is an answer, even if you cannot see it at the time.  But your subconscious mind is a supercomputer and if you program it to find the answer then that is exactly what it will do.  In fact, for the more technically minded among you I would argue that your subconscious mind is not just a supercomputer, but a quantum computer.  To check out what I mean by this you will have to wait for a future blog!

The opposite is the case if you think negatively.  You will be telling your internal computer that there is no answer.  As an entirely logical computer, it will not bother trying to find an answer it has been told does not exist.

If you have the choice of programming a computer to find an answer to your problem or simply allowing the problem to remain, which choice are you going to take?

The second reason I want to give is that like attracts like.  This is a natural law of nature.  If you have a positive attitude you will attract around you others with a positive attitude.  Remember the first reason?  That positive thinking will help you find the right answer?  But what if not only your own internal computer is looking for that answer, but also the internal computers of a crowd of people around you?  How much more likely does that make it that you will find the right answer?

The universe rewards positive thinking and penalizes negative thinking.  Do you want a reward or a penalty?  Isn't the answer obvious?

But let us now assume everything I have said so far is complete rubbish.  Is there still a good reason for thinking positively?  When you think positively you will be happy, but when you think negatively you will be sad.  Which would you prefer to be - happy or sad?  I know which I prefer!

The Sikh mystic who introduced Kundalini Yoga to the United States, Yogi Bhajan, said "If you are happy, happiness will come to you because happiness wants to go where happiness is".  How true this is!

Finally, I want to address the very valid point about what happens if the worst comes to the worst despite your positive thinking.  How can you deal with this?

I do agree that sometimes this can happen, no matter how positive you may be.  I happen to believe that in such cases this is because God, the Universe, or whatever you may choose to call the universal hidden power of good, has something even better in store for us in the future.  We just cannot see it yet.  So even in those moments of catastrophe we can be happy, knowing that it is all for the best and that there is something really great just around the corner.

It is also possible, and even advisable, to prepare for this eventuality before it occurs.  This is something I learned many years ago from the master of personal development, Dale Carnegie, in his wonderful book "How to stop worrying and start living", and I have never had to worry about what might go wrong ever since.  You can sum it up as "expect the best but prepare for the worst".  Think about the worst possible outcome to whatever problem you are facing.  Imagine it has happened (but don't focus on this too deeply, as you are not trying to attract that eventuality!).  Just how bad is it?  Is it the worst possible thing that could ever possibly happen?  Are there people in the world suffering any worse than this.  By thinking this way you will be starting to put it into perspective.  Now think about some of the adjustments you can make in your life in order to cope with the new situation.  Realize that once you deal with the situation properly it will not be as bad as you probably initially thought.  Accept the situation and be prepared to move on from it.  Now stop there.  Do not spend any more time on this negative outcome.  You are ready for the worst if it should happen, but you do not expect it to happen.  What you expect is a good outcome.  Focus on that.

If you prepare properly in this way you will not "feel even worse than if you had just accepted everything would go wrong in the first place", as in a sense you have accepted that possibility anyway.  You do not expect it and do not focus on it (thereby causing it to happen), but you are able to accept it.

So the next time you are tempted to think negatively remember everything I have said here.  In fact, read this article through several times right now.  Internalize it.  Let it become an integral part of your thinking.  You will most certainly find, if you do this, your life from now on will be happier and more productive!

If you want to get a copy of Dale Carnegie's book, you can find it here:

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living

The Power of Self-Coaching

by

Tamara Baruhovich

Coaching is becoming more popular than ever, simply because it works. Just take a look at the achievements that the Winter Olympic athletes attained and you'll clearly see what I mean. And this is no different with Life Coaching. Think about the times when you had to solve a problem all by yourself versus a time when you got the help and guidance of a friend or co-worker... which scenario was easier? In fact, your friend and/or co-worker acted as a coach even without knowing it.

However, even when you have a Life Coach guiding you through the process, there is something you can do to make your experience 100% infallible. You must commit yourself to adopt certain traits that will aid in propelling you towards your destination more efficiently. By this I mean that since your Life Coach cannot be whispering in your ear 24/7, or patting you on the shoulder every moment throughout the day, you must learn to self-coach yourself.

Self-coaching is related to positive self-talk, but it's much more than that. Follow these steps to self-coach yourself to realize your goals faster and easier...

1. Determine your purpose - You must not only know what you want to accomplish but WHY. This surely seems obvious, but for some reason the WHY keeps on getting forgotten or dismissed altogether. Knowing what you want and why you want it is the primary starting point for achieving the results you want, for it you don't know where you are going or what your motivation is, you will never get 'there'.

2. Write your action plan - Don't rely on your memory alone. Self-coaching involves writing the steps to reach your goal. Jotting down every step is powerful because it serves you as a map. Once you have it, proceed to give yourself commands that will prompt you to act. Keep track of your written goals. Modify them if they are not working for you. Nothing has been written in stone, so use them as guideposts and correct the aim if needed. One step at a time you will get to your destination.

3. Auto-suggestion - Self-Coaching incorporates positive self-talk. First, you must know and feel that you are capable of accomplishing your goal. Then, tell yourself you can do it and give yourself the reasons as to why this is so. Creating positive affirmations is helpful too. Craft and memorize a handful of positive affirmations that you can repeat as needed to feed your mind with positive thoughts every time you need a lift.

4. Self-advice - We have all 'heard' that critical voice in our head when we make mistakes... why not use this voice for self-advice? If you are between two or more decisions, 'ask' your inner voice for advice. Treat yourself 'as if' you were talking and listening to a friend that has the best in mind for you. Take a nature walk or meditate. Then ask, be silent, listen... An excellent time to do the 'asking' is right before you fall asleep. Let your subconscious mind search for the right answer and whisper it into your ear as you wake up.

5. Self-encouragement - When the going gets tough, take some time off to remember the times in your life when things seemed close to impossible and somehow you were able to overcome the obstacles. Remember what you did and how good you felt. Self-coaching encompasses recognition. Allow yourself to live the experience all over again. Use that positive feeling as a springboard to encourage yourself, as you have proven in the past that you can accomplish difficult tasks. Remember your "why" and think of new reasons that can support your determination and resolve.

6. Adopt a positive attitude - This may sound like a 'cliche' but I can't tell you how important this is to change your state at any given moment. You can feel positive any time you choose to by focusing on the good you already have in your life. Regardless of your circumstances, you do have many things to feel grateful for and thus, to encourage a positive attitude. The fact that you are reading this should be one reason to make you feel positive for you are seeking new ways to improve your life.

7. Get self-inspired - Self-Coaching involves finding motivating stories that serve you as inspiration. Read about people that have accomplished major goals related to what you want to achieve. They become your role models. Use their stories to inspire you to reach new heights.

8. Be relentless - One famous phrase says that "Success is a journey not a destination"... be persistent and don't forget to enjoy the process. After all, you are moving towards your goal, and that is what matters.

9. Be patient - Anything worthwhile takes time to come into fruition. Just keep on keeping and believe in the unseen... patience is the mother of all virtues.

Life Coaching is a wonderful option to support and guide you towards achievement of your goals, but when you add Self-Coaching to the mix, you will experience faster and better results while you learn a helpful skill that will last a lifetime.

About the Author:

Tamara Baruhovich is a Life Coach, Health Educator, Parent Educator, and Counselor. Tamara has dedicated over 25 years of her life to the health field, teaching, counseling, coaching and writing about common health topics, self-help and personal growth. You can reach Tamara with your questions at her website. She always takes the time to reply personally as her passion is to help others achieve their best.

"Discover Your Potential" is a powerful, self guided coaching eProgram that offers you the one-on-one assistance of a Life Coach. Complete details at http://www.Discover-Your-Potential.net

Self Esteem

Do you know anyone with dyslexia or other learning difficulties?  If so, please encourage them to read the following two articles, as they were written especially to remind them how wonderful they are and to help them cope with some of the special difficulties they may face in life.

But whether or not you may have such difficulties yourself, please read these articles too and put them into practice yourself.  You too are a wonderful person, and you too will sometimes face difficulties that may cause you to lower your own self esteem.  Remember it doesn't have to be this way!

Ten  Steps  to  Higher  Self  Esteem 

1)    Look at your experience as a whole. Recognise the significance that your learning difference has for you in your life. Do not blame or put yourself down in any way for any difficulties you have had or still have.

2)    Respect yourself and acknowledge your achievements and abilities.

Always give yourself credit where it is due and never underestimate the value or significance of any of your achievements.

3)    Recognise that you have faced difficulties and come

through them no matter how imperfect you may sometimes

judge your performance to be.

4)    Never fear failure, simply acknowledge it as feedback.

If something doesn't work out use the experience as an

opportunity to learn what is needed in order to change the result next time.

5)    Be flexible in all things. Realise that there is not just one way to succeed and win in life. Find what your talents and abilities are and nurture them.

This will help to build a strong foundation from which you can move towards what is for you success and a fulfilling life.

6)    Set realistic goals and break tasks down into manageable chunks.

This will help you to progress in a steady and consistent fashion and experience an increasing sense of achievement.

7)    Be your own judge and determine your own values and standards.

If you are true to yourself and make your sense of self-worth independent of external factors you will greatly enhance your self-esteem.

8)    Make a commitment with yourself to use affirmations, visualisation, positive thinking or any other technique that works for you to build and reinforce your self-esteem.

9)    Make a firm commitment to be kind to yourself.

Appreciate your strengths, acknowledge your weaknesses and learn from them but don’t dwell on them.

Give yourself the priceless gift of unconditional positive self-regard.

10) Accept ups and downs and be aware of change so you can adapt and move with it.

Most of all keep applying and living the Ten Steps to Self Esteem as only through working at them and believing in them will you gain the reward of life-long higher self esteem.

John M. Parke, ©1997 (dyslexic)

Counselling Adviser to the Adult Dyslexia Organisation (UK)

Ten  Tips  for  Adults  with  Specific Learning Difficulties

What do you like doing?         What are you good at?

Make a note of your strengths.

Try to become aware of yourself and the way you work or carry out everyday tasks. People usually cope best when they know about themselves.

Be aware of how you feel and what happens when you are tired, or stressed, and work out how to cope with it. People with Specific Learning Difficulties are more prone to stress and tiredness - these can make it worse.

Therefore develop your coping strategies - do not give up on writing cheques or memorising phone numbers. Have a go at alternative ways of remembering things. Carry 'aids' around with you such as checklists, Post-Its etc.

Consider what you find difficult.

Realise that there are things which everyone finds difficult.

Sometimes people push themselves too hard.

However if you really cannot (for example) do maths, then don't try for a job which might involve a lot of adding up or measuring.

 

Have an aim and go for it - on a small scale or on a large scale.

Write it down and put it up on the wall in front of you.

This helps focus the mind in work sessions.

Be aware of what you are aiming for and where you are going.

Think positively; expect to succeed.

Or at least, do not expect to fail - a 'failing complex' can quickly lead to failure. Sports people talk about developing the 'inner game' - they go out and expect to win and this gives them more confidence.

Decide if you are going to tell people about your Specific Learning Difficulties, and think about how you will say it, for example:

“It’s a different way of thinking and working”

“My spelling is a bit unreliable but I’m fine using a spellchecker on the computer”.

Remember there are things that you can do (due to the way you think and how you see things)  that other people find almost impossible ….

Adapted by Melanie Jameson from an information sheet by Dorothy Gilroy, Bangor Dyslexia Unit

Wellbeing Is a Way of Life

by

Valerie Cheong Took

Wellbeing is when we feel good within ourselves: happy with who we are, with what we have and having an optimist view of life in general. To take worries off our minds, we sometimes go for activities that make us feel good - eating chocolates/ice cream/crisps, retail therapy, talking with friends and watching TV shows. There are times when all these stress busters do not work. We feel uncomfortable, not knowing what to do next. There are other times when our worries come back soon after.

Maintaining a positive outlook on life is critical as we move forward in life. The things we do to keep our motivation ongoing can impact our general wellbeing if we become dependent on them. Snacking, shopping, watching movies are all healthy activities when they are done occasionally. Everything is about balance.

Continuing shopping when our wardrobes are already full of clothes or snacking when we have weight problems indicates an unhealthy dependency. There are other forms of dependency. Clutter is another example - keeping things in case we need them in the near future. After 1-2 years, these things are lying around without having been used once. It is sometimes of no use to tell ourselves that we need to declutter, stop shopping or snacking. We all wish it were that simple!

Understand your motivation to keep on shopping though your purse is tight or there is no need to. It is the first step towards gaining back your personal independence. There can be many reasons. Eating habits are sometimes cultural. In some communities, everything revolves around food - family gatherings, celebrations. In the past, these communities had to face food shortages due to war, droughts and financial hardships. Now that food is readily available, a lot of effort and time is spent on meals. Changing our food habits may involve reviewing our cultural norms or beliefs in relation to food.

Retail therapy can be a great booster for our self confidence. Our physical brand is an essential part of who we are. However, it does not define our self worth nor will it help to address the challenges that life brings to us. We are defined by our actions, strengths, weaknesses and what we choose as our core values. Making up for the loss in our self confidence by shopping is a temporary solution. What can sustainably boost our self confidence is facing the challenges, looking at them from a different perspective and letting go of the feeling of "being stuck".

Wellbeing is about building inner resilience and resourcefulness to address our daily challenges. Every answer lies within us. Hiding behind our busy lifestyle or our good looks does not resolve our daily challenges. Life coping skills are learned by doing. There's no other way of acquiring them. Reading books on positive thinking or shifting the blame onto others or procrastinating about them only makes them worse. Addressing them by trying out different options, applying all the empowerment techniques that you have been reading about builds your inner strength and nurtures your creativity.

Changing your habits take time. So think about what you can do as from today to regain your personal power and independence. Take one step at a time and achieve quick wins, ensuring that they become an integral part of your life.

To know more about wellbeing, Valerie provides one to one coaching and workshops for groups. Please visit http://www.valeriecheongtook.com for more information.

Detoxify Your Body Today

by

Michelle Schoffro Cook

Every now and then I read or hear someone say that the body doesn’t need to detoxify.  This is an appalling statement since the body cannot live without effective and efficient detoxification, which needs to occur in the lungs, liver, skin, intestines, kidneys, lymphatic system, and other areas of the body every minute of every day.

Our bodies are surprisingly good at detoxification but these processes can easily become overwhelmed due to the volume of toxins to which we’re exposed from our air, water, food, pharmaceutical and over-the-counter drugs, and many other sources.

These detoxification processes also rely on many critical nutrients (you’ll discover which ones below) to function properly.  Fortunately, there are many easy things you can do to help your body eliminate harmful toxins.  Here are 15 easy ways to detoxify today based on my book, The 4-Week Ultimate Body Detox Plan:

1. Eat pectin-rich organic apples.  Pectin binds to toxins in the intestines to escort them out of the body.

2. Drink a freshly-made veggie juice daily.  This can be as easy as throwing a couple of handfuls of leafy greens into a blender with some frozen berries and water.

3. Drink a large glass of purified water with the juice of one fresh lemon in the morning.  Lemons have over 20 proven anti-cancer compounds.

4. Eat blueberries daily.  They are rich in anthocyanins that reduce inflammation in the body and brain, as well as help reduce allergies and excess weight.

5. Remember to breathe properly.  Oxygen kills bacteria, viruses, and helps us to feel more energized.  Breathe deeply as much as possible.

6. Eat at least a half cup of legumes daily.  If they cause you gas, build up slowly and add a digestive enzyme with cellulase (breaks down the fiber in beans).  Fiber in beans helps keep the bowels eliminating properly.

7. Find the positive in every day.  Smile and laugh.  A positive attitude reduces the number of stress chemicals in the body.  And, as the adage says, “laughter is the best medicine.”

8. Take turmeric daily (a teaspoon in a small glass of water), added to soups or stews, or in capsule form.  It contains the phytonutrient curcumin that is one of the most powerful liver protectors and healers.  The liver is largely respositponsible for detoxification.

9. Eat more raw fruits and vegetables.  They contain enzymes that aid digestion and improve nutrient absorption.  Many nutrients are needed for efficient detoxification, including:  beta carotene, folic acid, niacin, pantothenic acid, riboflavin, thiamin, vitamin B12, pyridoxine, vitamin C, vitamin E, calcium, copper, germanium, iron, magnesium, manganese, molybdenum, selenium, sulphur, and zinc, among others.

10. Switch from chemical cleaning products to natural ones.  Chemical cleaning products contain toxins like formaldehyde, chlorine, petroleum products, ammonia, perchloroethylene (“perc”), and many other harmful chemicals that research links to cancer, skin conditions, asthma, and other serious health conditions.  Baking soda, vinegar, or orange oil work well.  No chemical cleaner removes stains as well as orange oil.

11. Eat at least three of the best detoxifying foods daily: broccoli, garlic, spinach, cabbage, sprouts, blueberries, and ginger.

12. Drink plenty of pure water to help flush toxins from your body.  Almost every process in your body depends on proper hydration to function smoothly.

13. Help remove toxins in your intestines by using aloe vera juice (about a quarter cup) or drinking a few cups of slippery elm bark, marshmallow root, or rhubarb root tea (about one teaspoon of the dried herb per cup of  water).

14. Take a probiotic supplement with live cultures on an empty stomach daily (morning or evening works well).  The beneficial bacteria kill harmful bacteria and yeasts and help to heal the lining of the intestines.

15. Get at least 30 minutes of vigorous physical activity daily.  Sweating is one of the best ways of removing harmful toxins, including heavy metals, from the body.


Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/15-easy-ways-to-detoxify-your-body-today.html#ixzz2M6sj1ReJ