Law of Attraction

I have often referred to the Law of Attraction in my blog posts.  But what exactly is it, what does it do, how does it do it, and how important is it to you and your own personal development?

First let me clarify.  The Law of Attraction is not something you can choose to use or to ignore.  Whether or not you like it you are "using" it all the time.  Whether or not you believe in it, the Law of Attraction is working right now and even as you read this it is bringing certain things into your sphere of influence.

The concept is actually very simple.  Like attracts like.  If you focus on certain things, those things are more likely to be attracted into your life.

Most of us, unfortunately, use the Law of Attraction in completely the wrong way, and that is why we get the wrong results.

Notice I said if you focus on certain things, those are the kinds of things the Law of Attraction will bring to you.  Not necessarily exactly the same things, but at least vaguely similar.  Also, maybe only indirectly.  Perhaps what will come into your sphere will be an opportunity to begin obtaining what it is you have focussed on.  But you have to recognize that opportunity.  Most people do not recognize it and therefore do not take advantage of it - and then they complain that the Law of Attraction did not work because it did not bring them the things they wanted.  That is a very lazy attitude, and if you are lazy you are unlikely to get very far in obtaining whatever it is you want.

Even worse, far too many people focus on what is wrong in their life rather than what is good and could be great in their life.  If you focus on what is wrong you will simply attract more of it.  The Law of Attraction will work.  It will respond properly to the instructions you are effectively giving it.  But those instructions are for completely the wrong things.

Take wealth, for example.  When you consider your own wealth do you focus on the fact that you are not wealthy enough?  That you don't have the money you need in order to achieve whatever you want to achieve?  If so, you are probably condemning yourself to losing even the wealth you currently have.  Certainly you are making it much more likely that you will lose it.

Jesus told his disciples "Whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them." (Matthew 13:12).  There are a number of different interpretations of this, but one is that if you are someone who "does not have" it means you are focussed on that lack rather than the abundance you could have.  Focus on what you do have, albeit so small, and be thankful for it, and you will find it will increase - maybe directly, or maybe indirectly, with the Universe putting you in the right place at the right time to create more of that good in your life.

So take away these three things:

1. Stop focussing on things you do not want to have in your life.
2. Be grateful for all the good things in your life, and express that gratitude
3. Recognize that the Universe brings opportunities to you all the time to increase those good things in your life - look for those opportunities and be ready to seize them.

Do this and you will find that little by little you are using the Law of Attraction properly, and more and more good things will begin to appear in your life.

Gratitude List

Take a clean sheet of paper and start writing down all the things for which you are grateful.  Keep writing until you can think of no more.  And when you get to that point, don't stop the exercise.  Sit there quietly meditating, and allow more thoughts of gratitude to come into your mind.  Carry on overleaf, and even on another sheet of paper if you fill up both sides.  That instruction alone should give you some idea of just how much I believe should be on your "Gratitude List"!

When I went through my own reasons to be grateful, I listed one that will probably shock you.  My prostate cancer!

I can hear the cogs going round in your brain right now!  "How could he possibly be grateful for having had prostate cancer?"  Well there are many reasons for this:

• I am grateful for the way in which my prostate cancer surfaced.  It gave me symptoms (I understand it usually doesn't), and so I was able to get treatment quickly.  The speed with which I was treated almost certainly saved my life!
• I am grateful that I live in a country where I can receive good medical treatment and that I don't have to pay for that treatment.  That is something for which I should be very grateful, and I am.
• I am grateful that the cancer I contracted was one that can be treated if it is picked up quickly enough, as I know there are many forms of cancer that are much more difficult or even impossible to treat.
• I am grateful that I was insured against cancer, and that I was able to use the insurance payout to pay off my mortgage and start a part time online business.
• The list goes on ...

Every morning when I wake up I am grateful that I have been given yet another day to achieve something.  Another chance to change the world.  Yes, change the world!  Everything we do results in changes in the world even though we may not see them.  When I smile at a stranger I have no way of knowing what effect that smile may have.  But what I do know is that the effect is much more likely to be good than bad.  Perhaps the person I smiled at was feeling unwanted and unloved, but then the smile comes and they think "even this person who doesn't know me likes me and is smiling at me".  This may change their life completely, and for the good.  Another person may find the unexpected smile so uplifting that they smile at the next few people they meet, some of whom then have a similar reaction.  The ripple effect!  My smile may literally travel around the world and back, changing hundreds of people!  And no, I don't believe that is an exaggeration.  I truly believe that can be the case.  Not with every smile, but every so often.  And I don't just smile, of course!  I try in other ways to make the world around me a better place.  And so, as I said, I am thankful that God has given me another day to change the world, and I do what I can to change it for the better.

When I first taught myself to sell, I read about a door-to-door salesman who had what seemed like a strange habit.  Every time someone rejected him he thanked them.  Most didn't comment and probably thought no more about it, assuming he was just being polite.  But one day someone asked him why he always thanked the people who rejected him.  I think the "someone" was a trainee salesman who had been told to "shadow" him, as he was the best salesman in his company.  Then the salesman explained he really was grateful.  Like any good salesman, he knew his statistics.  He knew that most people would reject him, but a certain percentage would want to buy what he was selling.  I cannot recall the figures, but let's just say it was 1% who would want to buy.  One in a hundred doors knocked.  So our salesman saw each rejection as one step closer to that one sale.  He knew he had to meet 99 people before he found the one who wanted to buy.  The person who just said "no" was one of the 99, so now there were just 98 left!  How is that for a positive view on life?  How is that for a reason to be thankful?

If you do put down anything on your list that could look negative, like my cancer, or the salesman's rejection, make sure you write a bit next to it explaining why you are thankful.  I strongly recommend you do this.  It can make a massive difference to the way in which you view the things in your life that seem to be negative.  And it is your attitude to what happens which really counts.  Nothing outside you can make you miserable.  It is your reaction to what happens that either makes you happy or sad.  Personally I prefer to be happy rather than sad, so I try to find the good in everything that happens - as you probably realize from what I said about my cancer.

So spend some time now thinking about all the positive outcomes from what might look like bad things that have happened, and add those positive outcomes to your list.

If you have done this properly you should now have quite a few pages listing all the reasons you have to be thankful.  Just producing this list will make at least a small change to the way in which you react to things in the future.  And you should look at this list often, so you become more and more positive about your life.

Do this, and the Universe will see you are thankful for what it gives you.  And guess what?  The Universe gives more to those who who are thankful for its gifts!  This is one very important step in the process called "Manifesting", which you can use to attract to you the things you want to receive.  Make sure you do this regularly, make sure you are always thankful for the many good things you receive and you will find, apparently mysteriously, the good things you receive will gradually increase.

The Habit of Gratitude

"When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breath, to think, to enjoy, to love."

No, this is not something written by a "new thought" guru.  It was written by the Stoic Roman Emperor, Marcus Aurelius, some time between 161 and 180 AD.  Marcus Aurelius was very much a student and practitioner of self-improvement.  He even wrote his "Meditations" (from which this quote comes) in Biblical Greek rather than his native Latin, purely to improve his fluency in that language.

How do you awaken every morning?  How do you feel?  What are your first thoughts and feelings?  Do you open your eyes, smile, and say "Good morning, God!", or do you keep your eyes closed, sigh, and say "Good God, Morning!"?  I hope usually the former, but perhaps at least some days it is more the latter!

The truth is, it really is a precious privilege to be alive, just as Marcus Aurelius said nearly 2,000 years ago.  So perhaps you should try to make your first thought when you awake a feeling of gratitude that you are still alive.  You have many things for which you should be grateful, but certainly being alive must be one of them.

It may not be easy at first to adopt this new habit.  But try to make it that - a habit of gratitude.  First recognize that you are still alive, that you are breathing.  That shouldn't be too difficult, even when you are half asleep and bleary eyed!  Then recognize that you have the ability to think.  Know that you have the right to enjoy this extra day you have been given life.  And feel the wonderful power of love around and within you.

When you first try to do this you will probably find it is quite erratic.  One day you will remember the moment you awaken.  The next day you will forget, and maybe only around midday will you suddenly remember that you forgot your morning "gratitude exercise".  When that happens, don't worry.  Simply feel and express your gratitude for life, thought, happiness and love the moment you remember to do so.  Just try whenever you can to remember to do it first thing so it colours your attitude to the rest of the day.

After a while you will find it starts to become a habit.  Some gurus will tell you that it takes 21 days to establish a habit.  But don't take that as gospel.  Otherwise you will be trapped into worrying when you miss a day and perhaps thinking you have to start counting towards 21 all over again, or at least deduct a few days from your progress towards 21.  The reality is there is no magic number to create a habit, not 21, or 30 or any other number.  So just keep doing it, and don't berate yourself when you miss a day, or even several days in a row.  Just keep going.  Express your gratitude every day, preferably at least when you wake up, but also later in the day - ideally in the latter case thinking of some specifics other than just life, happiness and love for which you have every reason to be grateful.

When gratitude becomes a habit you will find your life changes significantly, and for the better.  As I said before, we all have good reason to be grateful.  If you want to look for reasons to be unhappy I am quite sure you can easily find them.  But I also know you have many reasons to be happy.  So make it a habit to be grateful for those reasons you have to be happy.  By reminding yourself you have good reason to be happy, you will find you ARE happy.  And wouldn't you far rather be happy than be sad?

What you will also find is that things around you begin to change, and you will have even more reasons to be grateful.  Simply by feeling and expressing gratitude you will attract to yourself people and situations that will make you even more grateful, that will give you more reasons to be happy, that will increase the love you have for others and the love others return to you.

What a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breath, to think, to enjoy, to love.  It really is a privilege.  Recognize this, be grateful for it, and reap the enormous benefits you will gain as you do so.

Choose Happiness!

How happy do you want to be?  Very happy?  Moderately happy?  Or maybe miserable?

Yes, that's it, isn't it?  Miserable.  You want to be miserable don't you!

No?  Are you sure?  You don't want to be miserable?

In that case, why do you sometimes choose to be miserable?

Yes, that is what I said - you choose to be miserable.

We each choose how we want to feel all the time.  If you are happy, it is because you have chosen to be happy.  If you are miserable, it is because you have chosen to be miserable.

At this point I expect many of my readers are ready to disagree, to argue with me.  "I do not choose to be miserable!"  they say.  "I am only miserable because of ..." and you can fill that gap with many different things.  "... what has happened to me", "... the situation I am in", "... what so-and-so said to me", "... what so-and-so did to me", "... the terrible time I am having", etc, etc.

I don't want to brush aside whatever may sometimes cause your unhappiness, or what may even be causing you unhappiness right now.  Well, actually, I DO want to brush it aside, or rather want YOU to brush it aside, but I don't want you to believe that I am underestimating its importance and its power.  Yes, I know it has power.  A lot of power.  And maybe you have thought that there is no way past it and that you are destined to be unhappy more often than you are happy.  But I want you to recognize first that, no matter how powerful it is, no matter how dark it seems, it can only exert that power against you if you allow it to do so.  Your emotions are yours, and you have both the power and the right to change them.  If you don't want to be miserable, choose not to be miserable.  If you want to be happy, choose to be happy.

Have you heard of Nick Vujicic, the founder of "Attitude is Altitude"?  "Attitude is Altitude" believes that whatever our circumstances we each have the power to be successful.  If you have not come across Nick Vujicic before, then perhaps you are thinking "it is all very well for him!  He doesn't have to face what I face!"  True - Nick doesn't have to face what you face; only you have to face that.  What Nick has to face is having been born without arms or legs.  Not even being able to pick up a toothbrush to brush his teeth.  Is Nick miserable?  No!  He is happy!  If you have ever watched him speak you will have seen him filled with joy, totally inspired, and radiating that inspiration to all around him.  Despite his disabilities, Nick decided he wanted to swim, surf, and skydive, so that is what he did.  He decided he wanted to speak in front of thousands, inspiring them to achieve whatever they want to achieve, and that is what he does.  If you believe that circumstances, the situation you are in, is what causes you to be unhappy, then Nick should be very unhappy.  But he isn't.  Nick is happier than most people who are in good health and have all four of their limbs.

I am not saying it is easy to suddenly decide to be happy rather than be miserable.  Like all good things in life it requires practice.  But believe me when I say that practice is absolutely worth it.  Giving you the ability to be happy no matter what!

The first step to achieving this is to recognize where happiness and unhappiness come from.  They don't come from circumstances.  They don't come from your surroundings.  They don't even come from the people around you - although if you are surrounded by happy people it is much easier to allow that happiness to well up from within you too, and if you surround yourself with unhappy people it is very easy to forget to choose to be happy yourself.  So by all means do whatever you can to be surrounded by happy, positive people.  Do whatever you can to change your circumstances if they are not conducive to happiness.  But even as you do so, remember that ultimately the happiness you want has to come from within you.

Here is some advice from a person who has been dubbed "the world's happiest man" - Matthieu Ricard.

1  Stop thinking "me, me, me" all the time.  Not for ethical reasons, although I do believe it is far more ethical to think of others rather than yourself.  But the reason it is difficult to be happy if you just focus on yourself is because you will quickly see all the things that are wrong, that need to be changed.  You will tend to see what you don't have rather than what you do have.  And you will exhaust yourself trying all the time to find ways to change things.  I am not saying don't try to change things - it is always good to have targets you want to reach, things you want to achieve.  But don't spend all your time thinking "me".  Instead, think about others and how you can help them.  This has a double benefit.  Firstly, it stops you thinking "me, me, me", which is, as I have said, one of the easiest ways to make yourself unhappy.  Secondly, you will find as you help those around you so they will want to help you.  This should not be the motivation for helping them, but it will certainly over time change the circumstances you are in for the better.

2  Start training your mind to be happy.  Begin by setting aside just 15 minutes a day thinking happy thoughts.  Normally when you have happy thoughts they are ephemeral.  One minute they are here, and then suddenly they are replaced by unhappy thoughts.  In that 15 minute training period, focus on those happy thoughts and don't let them just melt away.  Other, less positive and less happy, thoughts will try to intrude, but brush them aside when they appear and switch your attention back to those happy thoughts.  If you meditate you will recognize that what I am suggesting here is a form of meditation.  But not "normal" meditation, which perhaps will just focus on your breathing or the light of a candle.  There is nothing wrong with "normal" meditation, and in fact I strongly encourage you to practise it (and using breath or the light of a candle is a very good way to do so).  But for this specific "happiness" exercise, focus on a happy thought.  Do this every single day, and in only two or three weeks you will feel so completely different.

Finally, remember to be grateful for all that you have.  No matter what your circumstances I can guarantee there is something to be grateful for.  Find that "something" and express your gratitude.  It may be something very small.  That doesn't matter.  In fact, it is good if it is small.  Learn to feel grateful for the small things, and the bigger, more obvious things will make you even more grateful.  And gratitude and happiness go hand in hand.

Recognize from now on that you have the right to be happy, that you can choose to exercise that right.

Decide to be happy from today!

The Ethics of Money

A few weeks ago I wrote about money.  This is a subject many "spiritual" people find challenging.  But it is also something we must all address unless we decide to go and live on a desert island.  We each have our own slightly different take on the subject.  You may find you disagree completely with mine, but hopefully not.

What are the ethics of having and using money?

My belief is that correct stewardship of money is highly ethical.  It is something that is required of all of us.  Notice my choice of word here - "stewardship".  One definition of stewardship is "responsibility to shepherd and safeguard the valuable of others".  So do I mean that our money belongs to someone else, not to us?  Yes, I do!

Money is not something you keep forever.  For a start, you will not be taking it with you when you leave this life.  Ancient Greeks and Romans believed it was necessary to pay a bribe to Charon, the ferryman whose job was to take you over the river between life and death.  But "Charon's obol" was just a single coin, not all the wealth the deceased had acquired during life.

Money belongs to society, not to you.  Some of your money is taken directly by society in the form of taxes which pay for all the services you enjoy.  But even the money that is not taken in taxes still really belongs to society.  If you are looking after it properly it is not hoarded by you and kept locked away - it flows through you.  As it flows, you can enjoy the benefits which come to you.  Be grateful for those benefits, and at the same time make sure the flow is not interrupted.  Some people do not allow it to flow properly, trying to keep it and all its benefits just for themselves.  Those same people also usually do not feel or express any gratitude for the benefits their money brings.  This is a very short-sighted attitude.  It is not only unethical, but also self-defeating.  Those of my readers who are Christian probably know the following quote very well:

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal." (Matthew 6:19)

Many people interpret that verse as saying it is unethical to acquire money.  But this is not what it says.  In my interpretation this verse tells me not to dam the flow of money, trying to keep it for myself, but instead to allow it to flow through me, bringing benefits not only to me but to those around me.

If you truly allow money to flow through you then you will find more and more comes to you.  Especially if you feel and show gratitude for it.  But if you have a very selfish attitude, feeling that only you should benefit from it and trying to stop the outward flow, you will find the inward flow also slows and less and less comes to you.  This is almost a law of nature.

Think about it for a moment.  When you use money it passes from you to someone else.  Presumably you receive something in exchange for the money, so you now have a benefit you did not have before the transaction.  This may be a very tangible, immediate benefit such as a nice meal at a restaurant.  Or it may be something less tangible and providing a benefit at some time in the future - for example a deposit on a holiday.  But whatever it is, you now have a benefit (or a right to a benefit) for which you should be grateful.  This is only one side of the transaction though.  The person to whom you paid the money now has more money.  If they are in business they may use some of that money to pay wages to their employees.  If enough money flows through them they may employ more staff.  So by allowing that money to flow through you, not only are you benefiting from whatever it is you are buying, but so are other people.  The business owner who may now be able to expand his or her business benefits.  So do the employees of that business who are employed only because you and others like you have allowed that money to flow.

As long as the people to whom you pay the money allow that money to flow through them as well, that flow continues on and on.  Just a small amount of money has a ripple effect that benefits so many people in so many different ways

This is why I think of the "ownership" of money as "stewardship".  You will not keep it.  It is your job to use it responsibly, allowing it to flow to others, bringing both you and them (and many others you have never even met) many different benefits.

Do not misunderstand me though.  I am not saying that you must go out and spend all your money, not saving or investing any of it!  That is not what I mean at all when I say you must allow it to flow through you.  It would most certainly not be ethical to spend it all and then rely on others to provide for your needs later.  Again, the word "stewardship" comes into play here.  Certainly invest your money so that you will have more to use in the future and will not have to rely on the charity of others or the safety net provided by the state.  Allowing money to flow is a state of mind, accepting that money belongs to the Universe, and that you are simply its custodian for a short period of time.  During that short time (your lifetime) it is your responsibility to see that it flows properly, providing the right benefits to you and to others.

Some of your money will (or at least should) be used mainly to bring benefits to others rather than to you.  For example any payments you may make to charities.  I say "mainly", though, as in reality this also brings you a benefit - the benefit of knowing you have done the right thing, of knowing you have helped others and that their lives are now better as a result of the gift you have made.

Think about how you are using your money, and make sure this is fully aligned with your core inner beliefs.  This is the true ethics of money - the ethics of right use, whether that is direct spending or investment.  You cannot be responsible for how others may end up using the money you have allowed to flow through you to them, but there are certainly some very obvious distinctions you can make when deciding how to use and invest your money.

From now on, never allow yourself to feel that money is evil, a burden, or something you have to grasp and hold on to.  Allow it to flow through you.  Channel it in ways that bring good into the world around you.  And feel and express gratitude all the time for the benefits that flow of money is bringing to you and all those in contact with you.

How to make a difference in the world

In my last blog I talked about how nobody can be too small or too insignificant to make a difference.  You make a difference all the time just by being who you are.  One person can make a real difference in the world, and if you have been reading my blog for a while you will have read stories of individuals who have done exactly that, sometimes in quite dramatic ways.

Some readers have asked me to be more specific.  "How can I make a difference?" seems to be a commonly shared question.

The first thing you must recognize is the importance of the little things.  These are the things that often truly make a difference in life.  If you run a business you will probably realize this.  Many of us who run businesses will have tried to find the really big change we can make and got frustrated we could not find it.  Those of us who remained successful probably did so by recognizing there is not one big thing we need to change but rather lots of little changes.  Each change of itself seems almost insignificant, but when you make a number of changes they multiply the effect rather than simply add to it.  It is the same with making things better in the world.  Do not expect there to be one big thing that jumps out and that you have to work on to effect change.  Almost certainly that will not happen.  You just have to do little things that improve the lives of those around you.

One of the first that comes to mind is expressing gratitude.  Too few people do this, so those who do make a significant change in the lives of people they meet - a good change.  Gratitude is really important.  Spend time thinking about all the things for which you should be grateful.  In many cases there will not be anybody specific you need to thank, but make sure you cultivate the habit of being grateful even when there is nobody to thank.  But there will also be lots of cases where there IS someone you can thank.  Make sure you do it, even if some time has passed.  There is a double benefit here.  You will almost certainly be making someone else feel really good, which can then multiply the benefit like ripples spreading out in a pond, but you will also be setting yourself up for receiving more of whatever it is you are grateful for.  Recognizing what you should be grateful for and then expressing that gratitude should become a habit.  Eventually you will do it without having to think about it, just like any other habit.  People will notice your gratitude and it will make you rather special in their minds.  It will encourage them to do even more things for you.  As I said, a double benefit.

Another important way of making a difference is to follow the Golden Rule.  In other words, always try to do to and for others what you would wish them to do to and for you.  Well, to be honest I would modify that rule slightly.  Empathize with those around you.  They may not actually want the things you want.  Try to feel what it is they would appreciate and do that for them.  The Golden Rule is a very good rule to use when you don't know people very well, so continue using it, but do everything you can to get to know people with whom you have any contact so you can treat them the way they would like to be treated.

As Gandhi said, be the change you wish to see in the world.  If, like so many Miss Worlds, you want there to be world peace, you have to start that within yourself.  Do everything you can to be a peaceable, non-violent person.  Whenever you are tempted to react in anger, pause.  Think about the situation from the perspective of the other person and modify your response.  Recognize that violence between countries and between people usually arises because of misunderstandings and the lack of ability to see things from a different perspective.  This attitude will then spread and "infect" those around you.  Unless you are the president or prime minister of a powerful country this is the only way you can create world peace, but believe me when I say it is very powerful indeed.

Think about what it is you do in life.  Your job for example.  If you really want to make a difference think about whether the work you do can make that difference.  If you are in a caring profession, for example nursing, teaching, social work etc, then it most certainly can.  These are jobs that make a difference.  But making a difference is certainly not restricted to these professions.  It may be that you will decide as a result to change career.  If not, then think about how you might change the way you work so that you make a difference to the lives of your work colleagues.

Be there for your friends.  This has so many meanings, and they are all important.  Yes, if a friend needs to know you are there to listen and sympathize then do that very simple but important thing for them.  Really listen to them and respond appropriately.  Do not be like the cartoon husband who just keeps saying "Yes, dear!" to his wife but isn't listening to a word she is saying.  When you are physically present, be mentally and emotionally present for them too.  Don't be like those you see who spend so much time texting friends who are not physically present that they pay no attention to those who are!  Be mindful, be aware, recognize the wonder that is around you - be fully focussed on what you are doing with your friends rather than thinking about, for example, what you are going to do next.

One practical tip which I mentioned in the previous blog, but which is so important I will say it again, is to smile.  Smiling is a universal sign of friendliness.  When you smile at someone it is much easier for them to smile back than to frown.  Believe it or not there was a study on this very subject in Sweden in 2002, where people were told to smile or frown when looking at photos of people smiling or frowning.  Sometimes they were told to smile in response to a frown or frown in response to a smile, and sometimes they were told to smile in response to a smile and frown in response to a frown.  The study proved beyond any doubt that if someone smiles at you it is easier to smile back than to frown.  Just think about this for a moment.  You smile at someone and this causes them to smile.  They may still be smiling several seconds later when they meet some other people.  Each of those people they meet then smile, and that too is reflected in the people they meet.  Just one smile from you can make an enormous difference.  Remember, when you smile you will be happier than when you frown.  Just as your inner emotions reflect physically in smiles or frowns, so those smiles or frowns reflect emotively in the way you feel. And yes, there have been scientific studies that prove this too!  So to create happiness in both yourself and those around you, simply smile!

There will certainly be plenty of things you can do to make a difference in the world that I have not listed here.  Each of us has very different circumstances and can effect change in so many different ways.  But if you try all of the above, and keep doing those things, I can promise you that the world will be a very much better place both for you and for those around you - and probably even for people the other side of the world through chance happenings of which you may never be aware!

Why be grateful?

Why be grateful?

Some may think I am a bit late writing about gratitude and should have done so a couple of weeks ago on Thanksgiving.  But I avoided doing so quite deliberately.  It is very easy for us to restrict positive feelings and actions to certain seasons and then ignore them for the rest of the year.  Some of my readers who are in the United States may do that with giving thanks on Thanksgiving.  Some of my Christian readers may do that with a whole range of positive feelings and actions, including gratitude, at Christmas.  And some of my Muslim readers may do something similar during Ramadan.

Gratitude is not simply for Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Ramadan.  It should be something we all practice every day.

When I asked the question "why be grateful?", how did that make you feel?  I would expect many readers immediately to think of things for which they are very grateful, even if it is "only" for the gift of life.  But others may have felt something negative.  We all experience low periods in our lives at some point, and if I happened to catch you in a low point in your life you may have reacted by thinking of all the bad things that have happened to you recently.  You may be tempted to say something like "it's all very well for you to tell me I should be grateful, but you don't know what I am going through right now!".  If that is you, let me say that you are quite right.  I do not know what you are going through, but I am really sorry you have to face it and I will hold you in the Light.  But also I can assure you that if you sit still, take a deep breath, and calm your mind you will find lots of things for which you should be grateful.

Assuming you have now identified the many things for which you should be grateful, let me ask you another question.  Why do you need to be grateful at all?  Why not just accept those things as your right and not bother to be grateful at all?

If you are at all religious you may simply say that God, or whatever else you may call the Supreme Being, requires this of you.

OK, that may be true, but I think it is also a bit of a cop out.  Is there any logical reason for being grateful, above and beyond what your religion may say?

There are many good reasons to express gratitude.

Firstly, if you express your gratitude out loud, to whoever deserves it, this can have tremendously positive results.  Positive feedback encourages the person who has done something good to do even more good.  Many people can then benefit from this, including perhaps yourself as well.  All for the small "cost" of saying thank you in a way that shows you genuinely mean it.  The world in which we live can be almost hell on earth or heaven on earth, often simply from the way people around us behave.  Your "thank you" to one of those people can be infectious, changing not only the way that person behaves but also the behaviour of the people around them too.  So the end result of your simple expression of gratitude could turn someone's hell into heaven.

Secondly, whether or not you say "thank you" out loud, if you feel really grateful for something this will be noted by your subconscious.  Now that subconscious is a very powerful entity.  If it recognizes that you are grateful for something it will try to give you more of it.

Just think a little about this second reason.  Think about some of the things for which you are grateful.  How would you like to have even more?  Isn't that a good feeling, knowing that all the good things you have in your life can keep growing and attract other, similar good things to you?

If you have been following my blog for some time you may remember that I have encouraged you to list all the things for which you should be grateful.  Try that now.  This should be a really long list.  If it is not, then there is something very wrong.  Now look at each item on the list and imagine having more of it or attracting to you something else that is very similar.  Then remind yourself that if you keep expressing gratitude for this thing, that is exactly what will happen.  Your life will get better and better.  Isn't that a great reason to be grateful?

Try this today, right now!  Start expressing your gratitude and see what a difference it makes in your life!

Thanksgiving and the Law of Polarity

For those of my readers based in the States, assuming you are reading this on the day it is published, tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day.  A day on which, naturally, we express our gratitude.

A few weeks ago I wrote an article about expressing gratitude, but if you are not actually grateful that is not possible to do.  Even if you think you are grateful, you may well find that there are many things for which you should be grateful but are not.  If you are not grateful for absolutely everything and everyone in your life, then you still have some work to do!  So today I want to explore gratitude more fully and link it to what I call "the law of polarity".

Some people list all the things that are wrong in their life and then more or less say "look at that list and tell me why I should be grateful!"  Those are people who have clearly not heard of the law of polarity.  This law says that everything has two equal and polar opposite sides.  Every situation that looks so bad has an equal measure of good if only you will look for it.

If you truly understand the law of polarity, this will change your life dramatically.

Everything that happens just “is”.  But like two sides of a coin it has one side that seems terrible and another that looks great.  You get to pick.  You can have the terrible side or the great side.  Which will you choose?  Whichever you choose, that is what will materialize.

Remind yourself that the universe is friendly to you.  There is a limitless supply of everything you require.  An infinite supply of money, clients, time, love, friendship, whatever.  No circumstances can leave you lacking in these things for long unless that is what you choose – consciously or unconsciously.  Don’t focus on the one you have just missed – focus instead on what is coming.

Next, remind yourself that you get to choose what to call the circumstances you are in.  You get to decide whether there is good or bad in them.  Sometimes it can be very difficult to see the good when you are right in the middle of something that seems so bad, but just understand it really is there.

The worst experiences you have should prove to be the greatest gifts.  They are your instructors.  Each one bears within it the seed of something that is amazing if you will only be ready to accept it.

Have you seen the film “Front of the Class”?  This is the true story of Brad Cohen, a man suffering from Tourette’s Syndrome who becomes a teacher.  Others suffering from this condition may have railed against it and asked why it had to be this way.  But Brad Cohen viewed his Tourette’s Syndrome as the best teacher he could have, showing him the way to become a very good teacher himself.  Brad certainly understands the law of polarity better than most people, and he has used it to great advantage.

Now that you too understand the law of polarity, you should use it to your advantage, just like Brad Cohen.

Begin by taking a sheet of paper and filling it with all the things for which you are grateful.  Make certain you have listed at least twenty-five or thirty items and that you have included at least a couple of items from each area of your life.  Include your monetary resources, health, career, relationships, recreation and anything else you can add to this list.

Stop right here and do the above before you read any further!

How did you find this exercise?  Was it easy?  Did you have any trouble making the list long enough?  A short list means there are still a lot of things in your life to which you have not yet applied the law of polarity.  These are the areas where you do not like things the way they are.  So here comes part two of the exercise:

Take another sheet of paper and make a different gratitude list, again covering all the different areas of your life.  However, for this list, begin with things you don’t like.  The boss with the bad attitude.  The car that won’t start.  Your ex.  Your cantankerous adolescent stepdaughter.  The tax man.  The pimple on your nose that won’t disappear.  The bills that keep arriving.

Now use the law of polarity.  Find the other side for each of these items.  For example, with the list I suggested in the previous paragraph you might enter the following:  Gratitude that you have a job.  Gratitude that you have a car.  Your fresh insights into relationships.  New parenting skills.  The money you have received on which you now have to pay tax.  A sound body.  The advantages of the merchandise and services you have received.  Get the idea?

Discover something to be thankful for in each of the items on your list and write it down.  Fill the paper with these gratitude assertions.

Again, don’t read any further until you have completed this exercise!

How was that?  Did you feel particular resistance to some of the items on this list?  Difficulty in finding the good side?  These are areas in your life where you particularly need to focus and find the good side, as they are the very areas that are holding you back.  Keep working on them until you have prised out those good points.  Any time you spend doing this will be well rewarded.

If you want to explore in more depth the law of polarity and the other laws which together allow you to use gratitude to create unlimited abundance, get yourself a copy of my e-book, "Gratitude Now".

Gratitude

Do you start and finish each day expressing gratitude?

If not, why not?  Do you feel you have nothing for which you should be thankful?  I can assure you that cannot be true.  For a start, you are reading this, so you must be alive!  Not only alive, but also in possession of at least one of your five bodily senses - one which Helen Keller never had, but Helen was thankful for what the Universe gave her!

Perhaps you ARE thankful but do not feel the need to express this.  That is a BIG mistake.  You need to express it not because there is a jealous God out there who will punish you if you don't give Him His due (personally I believe in God, but I do not attribute to Him petty human emotions like that).  You need to express it so that you really internalize how much you have for which you should be grateful.  The more you do this, the more positive you will become.  And the more positive you are, the better the life you will have.

This applies both to saying "thank you" to the Universe (or God, depending on your religious views) and also to the people around you who have contributed to your happiness.  By saying "thank you" to other people you will not only feel really positive yourself, but you will be spreading that positive feeling to others.  A win-win situation!

If you are really grateful, then you should also look for ways to "give back" to God, or the Universe.  There are so many ways you can do this.  Any limitations you see are just in your mind.

Stuck for ideas?  Let me give you a couple of ways I have expressed my gratitude recently.  Both happen to relate to charities, but neither involve much (or even any) digging into your pocket.  You can copy these ideas, contribute to the charities, or simply use theme as stepping stones to find unique ideas yourself.  Do whatever you wish with them - just do something.

Last Sunday I committed myself to running a half marathon in aid of a charity called the Himalayan Peoples Project - Nepal.  This charity is a small but very dedicated charity which is trying to improve the lives of poor and disabled people in Nepal.  You can find out more about it at www.hppnepal.co.uk.  I have never run or walked anywhere near that far, but I was determined to complete the half marathon.  As I got within a few miles of the finish line I felt as if my legs were about to fall off.  Quite literally - I actually wondered briefly whether they were suddenly going to disclocate!  But I kept going.  Why?  Because I am grateful for my health.  I have had cancer, and still suffer some permanent after effects of the treatment, but I am far healthier than many of the people the charity wants to help.  I am grateful for that, and wanted to do something to help them.  Notice I didn't actually have to dig my hand into my pocket - my gratitude was expressed in another way.

You can see the view I had of the finish line here, just approaching Windsor Castle a few miles away in the distance.  Put yourself in my place.  How does that make you feel?

How do I feel now?  Great!  I am fitter as a result.  At the top of this article you can see me just after I got my medal that proved to me I did it!

I also feel more positive.  And I know I can send a lot of money to the charity thanks to the people who sponsored me.

How do those sponsors feel?  They feel great too, knowing the good that will now be done with their money.  Another win-win situation!

Then, a couple of days later I did something to help another very small charity.  The Chreda Foundation, which helps young people with their spiritual development, in the widest possible sense.  What did I do?  Help launch a challenge which the Foundation hopes may go viral just like the Bucket Challenge did - but one which is more environmentally friendly.  Everyone who participates in the Dragon Challenge donates a small sum (the Foundation asks for just $10, or £5) and then performs musically on the internet.  It doesn't have to be star quality - check mine out and you will realize that!  All that is important is that you give it a go.

You can see my attempt here:

Was it fun doing it?  Yes it was.  Did it help me at all?  Yes - it made me put some time into learning to play a keyboard properly, which is something I had been meaning to do but never actually got around to doing.

And again I feel more positive.  A little bit of money has gone to the charity, but if the people I have included in the challenge do it, then more will go.  And if the people they challenge do so as well, then even more will go.  Perhaps even you will give it a go, and become an honorary Dragon, after reading this and watching my attempt.

These are just a couple of examples.  Nothing really big.  But a way of giving back to the Universe (or God).

I am doing my bit, and I will stay grateful and keep finding more ways to express my gratitude.

How about you?

Be Your Own Santa Claus

by

Dr. Debbie Thompson

For those of you who do not acknowledge or embrace the whole 'Santa Thing', please bear with me.

What if you could recreate the spirit and generosity of the Christmas season 365 days of the year? Be your own Santa Claus. You can!

Imagine you have access to a giant 'Everything In Life' catalog system. You can compare this catalog system to a giant Amazon.com or Sears & Roebuck catalog (for those of you who haven't entered the realm of Amazon.com online ordering yet).

You can order whatever you want to Be, Do or Have. This catalog contains an abundance of choices from the generous unlimited world that you live in. You are surrounded by opportunities. The effectiveness of your life catalog shopping is only enhanced by using the Law of Attraction.

When I was a little girl on the farm in Illinois, we ordered clothing from Sears & Roebuck, J.C. Penney's and Montgomery Ward. It was so exciting to fill out the order blanks all by myself with all of the numbers, colors and sizes. Before I filled out the order blanks I would spend hours and hours looking through the catalogs to choose what I wanted.

Have you taken the time to browse through your 'Everything In Life' catalog system and made your choices?

How to shop the 'Everything In Life' catalog:

• Expand your Law of Attraction knowledge
• Visualize your Be, Do & Haves
• Visualize resources, people and everything you need to know.
• Clearly define what you want
• Write your order out in detail
• Focus on what you want (not what you don't want)
• Magnetize your vision by bringing feelings of excitement like it has already happened
• Be in gratitude for what you have already... just as it is

Possible items you might be ready to order:

• BE - I passionately express myself through my art.
• BE - I joyfully live a magical, playful life full of friendships, adventure, vitality and unlimited energy.
• DO - I contribute to college scholarships for young women.
• DO - I move everyday for at least 30 minutes... walk, hike, dance, swim, etc..
• HAVE - My body is fine tuned for love, life, adventure, happiness, laughter and longevity.
• HAVE - My mind is clear and focused.

Supercharge your results:

• Create at least 100 Be, Do, Haves on your 'Santa List'.
• Express gratitude daily - Be generous with everyone (including yourself).
• Start a gratitude journal. (health... home... friends... flowers... mountains... the sunny day... )

This could be your first time hearing about Law of Attraction. You could be someone who has learned allot about Law of Attraction. Just know that the biggest thing that stands in your way of your Be, Do, Haves is your past: negative thoughts and beliefs that will want to argue with why your can't have what you are asking for.

Learn how to be very skilled at putting an end to these arguments.

Never give up on your dreams. Be your own Santa.

Discover how your energy can be aligned with your Be, Do & Haves as quickly as possible with a life changing energetic shift. http://www.miraculousyou.com/life-reset-123/sessions/

If you feel blocked/stopped in relationships, career, wellness or any other aspect of life a Life Reset 123™ session is an effective way to remove negative past influences, your unconscious blocks and expand your Prosperity and what matters to you the very most. http://www.miraculousyou.com/the-energy-doctor/

About the Author:

As a chiropractor and Life Reset Coach, Dr. Debbie Thompson started helping 1000's of people in the greater Seattle area in 1994. In 2012, she opened, 'Life Reset Chiropractic' in Glendale, AZ, and continues to assist people reach their highest vitality and wellness possible.

She completed her undergraduate studies at Colorado State University and University of Colorado. She graduated with a Doctorate of Chiropractic and Bachelor of Science in Human Biology from Western States Chiropractic College in Portland, Oregon.

In 1996, Dr. Debbie noticed her patients were not reaching their fullest physical recovery with chiropractic adjustments alone. She knew there had to be another way. Dr. Debbie's passion for her patients lead her on a quest where she discovered various energetic healing methods based on Quantum Physics which addressed physical, emotional, mental and non-physical issues.

While on this quest, she created her own energetic healing method called Life Reset. With Life Reset audios, teleclasses and webinars, Dr. Debbie is able to reach out worldwide. Life Resets consistently and effectively help to delete out past negative thoughts, beliefs, conversations and life experiences that have been standing in the way of your fullest potential. The result is giving you access to experience life far beyond what you ever thought was possible before.

Dr. Debbie shares simple and effective ways to "Ignite the ALL that YOU are!"

Embrace Life

56 Reasons to Fiercely Embrace Life

by: Anne - Sophie Reinhardt

Life is grand, full of magic, hope and possibility.

However, sometimes it’s hard to see how lucky and fortunate we are to be here. We get so caught up in our daily stresses that we completely forget how awe-inspiring and miraculous living really is. We go through the motions, get in a rut and are busy putting out one fire after the next in an attempt to keep our lives in balance.

Yet, drama happens all the time.

Our projects don’t work out, our businesses aren’t going the way we had hoped for, our relationships experience troubles, the economy is bad, politicians let us down and life is just not the way it’s supposed to be.

It’s easy then to get sucked into a spiral of self-doubt and weariness. It’s easy to loose hope, feel listless and ready to just give up.

Speaking from experience, I know how destructive these feelings can be and how easily they overshadow your entire world. But if you take a moment to breathe, open your eyes and see, just see, all the marvels of this world, it’s hard not to be speechless, feel grateful and happy to be alive.

Since I know I’m not the only one who sometimes lacks inspiration, I created the following list of reasons to love being alive, living on this beautiful planet and sharing these times with so many incredible fellows.

Ready? Let’s go.

1. The roar of the ocean on a windy day.

2. Receiving help in unexpected ways.

3. The wistful longings of a heart in love

4. Hearing my grandfather express his undying love for my grandma (OK, that’s a very personal one, but I couldn’t not mention it).

5. Hearing the soulful sounds of music that go straight to your heart.

6. Experiencing the beating of your heart after a long, hard workout.

7. The touch of your mom lovingly going through your hair.

8. The belly-laughter experienced when you’re with great friends.

9. The promises of a new day when watching the sunrise.

10. Witnessing the genius of writers who work magic with their words.

11. The excitement in the eyes of your favorite pet when coming home.

12. The sheer joy of seeing friends long lost.

13. Seeing a loved one succeed in life.

14. A blue blue sky.

15. The work of photographers that portray a model’s soul.

16. Tasting the sweet deliciousness of chocolate.

17. The wonderful aroma of coffee beans.

18. The safety of being wrapped into your loved one’s arms.

19. The freedom of knowing that you’re worthy of love.

20. The delight in sharing your wisdom and knowledge with others.

21. The pleasure of feeling the sun on your face or the wind in your hair.

22. Feeling the melancholy that comes with winter deep in your heart.

23. Seeing the beauty of white, white snow glistering in the sun.

24. Experiencing the warmth streaming through your body when drinking a hot chocolate on an ice-cold day.

25. The wonder of exploring new places and worlds.

26. The look up in a star-filled sky that puts life and the world into perspective.

27. Seeing the innocence in a toddler’s eyes.

28. Experiencing the trust of true friends.

29. The awe-inspiring performances of world-class athletes.

30. Listening to the beautiful sounds of Mozart’s genius.

31. The growth as a person on every single day.

32. The beautiful smell of the air after heavy rain.

33. The powerful realization that your potential is limitless.

34. The thrill of speaking foreign languages.

35. Tuning into the miraculous workings of our bodies.

36. The luscious green of the rain forest.

37. Falling into your bed after a long and hard day.

38. The refreshing feeling of putting on freshly washed clothes.

39. Experiencing the humbling feeling of seeing friends have your back

40. The empowerment of getting yourself out of a mess.

41. Spending a day in bed with breakfast and a captivating book.

42. The pride of holding an Asana for the very first time.

43. The first signs of spring after a long, cold winter.

44. The first signs of fall after a hot summer.

45. The breathtaking view out of an airplane’s window.

46. Witnessing two people promising to stay together all of their lives.

47. Finally figuring out what you’re truly hungry for.

48. Giving to others and experiencing their joy.

49. Seeing ordinary people change the course of humanity.

50. Listening to the wealth of wisdom shared by your grandparents.

51. A cold shower on a brutally hot summer day.

52. The overwhelming feeling of seeing the Grand Canyon for the very first time.

53. The grace of ballet dancers floating across the stage.

54. Falling in love with your glorious body.

55. Coming home.

56. The realization that life, after all, is immeasurably valuable.

What are your reasons to lovingly and fiercely embrace life?

Turn Into An Effective Individual

Standard Strategies On Exactly How To Turn Into An Effective Individual

 Author: harry888

Self-help is written off by many, to be ineffective or a waste of time. In all likelihood, these critics have not paid attention to specific techniques that exist to pursue an organized, directed self-help strategy that slowly but surely, yields results. This article lists some of these techniques in a straightforward, easy-to-implement manner.

Create goals that are personalized to you. You aren't going to respond well to goals of another because only goals that are personalized to you take your personal limits and capabilities into consideration. If you are able to create goals tailored to you specifically, you will find it easier to reach your goals.

Have plenty of self confidence in yourself. Never doubt that you cannot do what you set out to do. Set realistic goals for yourself, things that are attainable and within your reach at the time being. This will ensure that you never feel self conscience and always have plenty of self confidence.

There are seven secrets to success that will bring about true personal development. They are direction, destination, action, reaction, acceleration, completion and reproduction. Go through these steps in order and make sure to share your success with others. Success becomes more real to you when you can talk about it.

While the term "self-help" implies that you can lift yourself up by your bootstraps and better your life, you can never do this alone. Seek out colleagues and mentors who can give you wisdom or advice during crucial times. By building a network of supporters and asking for help, you make yourself better-equipped to help yourself and survive troubled situations.

Reach for goals that may be just out of your grasp. You will never grow unless you challenge the limits of your comfort zone. You do not want to try and attain impossible goals, but you do want to attempt new things. This is the only way that you will change and grow as a person.

If you focus too much on what you want, then you create reasons for why you can not have what you want. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. Rather, focus on gratitude. Every day, you should focus on things that you are grateful for. This will give you a positive outlook on life.

There are many ways to learn life's lessons. One way to learn a lot while at the same time helping others is by listening to other people. We all need a listening ear, and too many people do not take the time to do this. Listen to others, and you will see a marked difference in your life.

In order to really feel the need to make a change, you have to be dissatisfied with your current situation. If you are not completely happy, you will want to improve yourself. Just be cautious so that you are not getting down on yourself, but are giving yourself motivation for change.

Use mistakes as growing points. Everyone is going to make mistakes from time to time, whether serious or very minor. Either way you go, you have to understand that these mistakes are sometimes inevitable, and the best thing you can do is learn and grow from these mistakes, using them to propel yourself forward instead of letting them hold you back in frustration and discouragement.

Do not just react to whatever events are taking place in your life. Always be proactive more than reactive. Being reactive is just accepting whatever events come your way. Being proactive isn't just taking care of those events but also creating your own events. Stay away from just being reactive and become proactive.

A great personal development tip that every single person should really follow is to love yourself. Really truly love the person you are no matter what aspects of yourself you are upset with. Understand that you can always better yourself, but before you can, you have to really love yourself.

Don't forget to make time for yourself. No matter what your ultimate goals are, if you fail to make time for yourself you're most likely setting yourself up for failure. No one can do everything that life requires of them (work, family, etc) in addition to striving for personal goals if they don't periodically take a break and breathe.

When seeking to develop your personality it is key that you seek purity as opposed to seeking eloquence. In other words, seek wisdom that is both pure and powerful. Learn how to discern the difference between truth and wickedness. Once you distinguish the difference between these two you will gain both understanding and insight.

The tips listed in this article, provide a wonderful way for anyone to start a wonderful journey of self-help. Common criticisms of the self-help process are often rooted in the thought of self-help as unorganized or nonsensical; however, by using the tips in this article, you can direct yourself in a calculated manner and achieve your personal goals of improvement.