Wednesday, 27 April 2016

Hypnosis



What do you think about hypnosis?

Does it work?  Is it just a party trick?  Is it safe?  Is it good or evil?  What should I use it for?

These are questions some of my subscribers have put to me when I have mentioned hypnosis.

There are, of course, many forms of hypnosis.  Some techniques you can use to hypnotize yourself.  Others are to hypnotize others.  Many can be used both on yourself and on others.  The answers to most of those questions depends on which forms of hypnosis you are using and particularly how you are using them.

Does it work?


"Does it work" is perhaps the easiest to answer.  In a word, YES!

The sub question "will it work for me?" is also quite easy to answer.  Yes, it will, as long as it is done properly.

Of course, whether it will achieve the results you intend is yet another question.  There is absolutely no doubt that hypnosis works.  But if you go into hypnosis in the expectation there will be instant dramatic results you may be disappointed.  There are certainly many documented cases of instant dramatic results, but you cannot rely on this being the case.  It is better to view hypnosis as a tool you can use in order to improve your own personal development, or that of others.  A tool you should use regularly, and which will gradually bring you closer to your objective.  If you DO get an immediate, dramatic result then that is a bonus.

Is it just a party trick?


A party trick?  Yes, some people use hypnosis that way.  Personally I do not like this use of what should be a very effective improvement technique.  But yes, there are some people who use it to manipulate other people on stage, getting them to do silly things, getting them to forget immediately something that has just been said to them, etc.  But this is not the form of hypnosis I am talking about here.

Is it safe?


Is hypnosis safe?  To be honest, that depends.

As I have already said many times, hypnosis is a tool.  A very useful and powerful tool.  Are tools safe?  If they are properly made and then used properly, yes they are.  But if you have a faulty tool, or use it inappropriately it can cause a lot of damage.

Before undergoing any form of hypnosis, whether it is self-hypnosis or conducted by a qualified hypnotherapist, you should be fully aware of the end goal and ideally should also be aware of the steps that will be used to reach that goal.  You should also be able to trust the person who is going to use it on you, or the person who has taught you to use it on yourself.  Follow these rules and hypnosis is safe.

Is it good or evil?


Is hypnosis good or evil?  Let me be clear about something right away.  Hypnosis is not a dark art practised by devil worshippers or some other evil cult.  Or perhaps I should rephrase that - it doesn't have to be a dark art.  As I said previously, it is simply a tool.  A tool is not, of itself, good or evil.  What is good or evil is the way in which it is used.

If you are particularly religious you should not worry about the practice of hypnosis in some way conflicting with or being against the precepts of your religion.  Does your religion tell you that it is evil to use a screwdriver?  I hope not!  But it probably does tell you that you should not use it to poke someone's eyes out!  Likewise, there is no reason why it should tell you that using hypnosis is wrong per se.  What is really key here is HOW you use it, what you are using it FOR.

How should hypnosis be used?


Which brings us to the final question.  What SHOULD you use hypnosis for?

Hypnosis can be used for many good purposes.  You can cure many different maladies with it, especially but not exclusively those that are concerned with your mental state.  For example many people use hypnosis to remove irrational phobias.  You can use it to strengthen positive aspects of your personality.  You can use it to remove mental and emotional blocks which are preventing you achieve what you want to achieve in life - and all of us have such blocks, so hypnosis can be useful for all of us!

The number 1 rule is that the purpose itself should be the right purpose.  Never, under any circumstances or for any reason, use hypnosis to make someone do something they do not want to do.  This applies whether or not you believe that purpose is a good purpose.  For example, if your partner smokes and you want them to stop smoking because it is bad for their health, do not start using hypnotic techniques to wean them off their cigarettes without their knowledge and permission.  To do so would be an evil act even if it is done with a good motive.  The same applies when using hypnosis on yourself.  Do not try to use hypnosis to achieve a certain result unless you are sure that is a result you really want to achieve.  I believe before you use self hypnosis you should meditate, focussing on whatever it is you want to achieve with the hypnotic techniques.  Use your intuition to determine whether or not this is the right thing for you.  Only proceed if it really is.

Hopefully I have put your mind at ease if you had any doubts about the value or morality of hypnosis, but also given you pointers to avoid using it in the wrong way.  Add hypnosis to your toolkit for self-improvement and I believe you will be amazed by the progress you can make.

Wednesday, 20 April 2016

How intuitive are you?



Stop a moment, without reading any more, and try to answer this question honestly.  Do you have any intuitive ability at all?  Is there even such a thing as intuition?  Answer these questions and then return to this article.

........................................................................

Let me guess.  If you are male, did you answer that intuition is more of a female trait?  Wrong!  Intuition is not gender specific!  That is as incorrect as saying that females can multi-task and males cannot.  You believed that old wive's tale too?  Well, more on that in another blog!

Did you perhaps say that you do not have the gift of intuition?  Wrong again!  True some people seem to have the gift of being intuitive naturally and others don't.  But all actually have the gift - it is just more carefully hidden in some than in others.

Did you say that you are more of a left brain than a right brain person?  Well that really has nothing to do with intuition and creativity, no matter how often you may read online that it does.  If one side of your brain is more dominant than the other, that has very little to do with whether you are more rational or more intuitive.  Different abilities do tend to be associated with different sides of the brain, but this can vary from person to person, and also if someone suffers damage in one brain hemisphere it has been found they can transfer some of the functions associated with that side to the undamaged side.

Whatever reason you may have given to show why you are not really intuitive is actually totally wrong.  You are intuitive.  All of us are intuitive.

The definition of intuition is the ability to acquire knowledge without the use of reason.  This is a skill we need as a species.  If we had to reason every issue to the Nth degree we could not survive as a species - we would be killed by every major danger that arose before we had decided what to do about it.

Intuition is a very powerful ability when you use it properly.

If you run a business you may already be aware of this.  It is usually the first thought that comes to you that is the right one.  Especially when trying to assess people.  Most of us then spend the next few hours or days trying to justify logically, with the power of reason, what we already knew without any reason at all.  That is the power of intuition in action.

Have you ever noticed that you just have a feeling that something is not right?  You don't know why you have that feeling, but it is there deep within and it is very powerful.  When you ignore it, then something seems to go wrong.  Has that ever happened to you?  The next time you get that feeling, just walk away.  The feeling is right.  Something within you has recognized the danger even though there is no apparent logical reason for it.

Trust me in this.  You DO have the power of intuition.  You CAN use it, and use it very effectively.  But just like a muscle, you need to keep using it to make it more powerful, to take it to the point where you can gain great benefit from it.

Now that you know this, start listening for that inner voice.  Take note of what your intuition is telling you.  Use it to find what you should really be doing, what your true desires are, how you can develop yourself and become a better person.  All that knowledge is already there inside you, ready to come to the surface through the process we call intuition.







Wednesday, 13 April 2016

Money



Money is the root of all evil.  Right?  Wrong!

It is surprising how many people seem to believe this though.  Where does this belief come from?

Well, first it comes from a misquote from the Bible.  Yes, I did say "misquote".  Nowhere in the Bible does it say that money is the root of all evil.  What it does say is "For the love of money is the root of all evil" (1 Timothy 6:10).  Note the difference.  It is not money that the Bible says is evil, but the love of money.  Note also that it does not say something like "the love of things that money can buy".  Just "the love of money".

These days, though, there is perhaps another reason so many people believe money is evil.  If you are a banker please forgive what I am about to say.  There are now very many people in the world who blame all our economic problems on bankers and the money systems we have.

Finally, there is the myth of King Midas, who asked the god Dionyssus for the gift of turning everything he touched into gold.  Dionyssus told Midas to think very carefully about this request, but Midas insisted and Dionyssus granted his wish.  The gift, of course, was a curse.  It was not gold that could bring Midas happiness but rather the things that gold could bring him.  He found that he did not want everything he touched to turn into gold.  Especially not when he found he could not eat, as the food he touched turned into gold.  And very especially not when he hugged his beloved daughter and she turned into a golden statue.  There is a happy ending to the story of King Midas though.  He very quickly realised how foolish he had been and begged Dionyssus to take away this "gift".  Dionyssus told King Midas to wash his hands in the river.  This he did, and then he found that everything he had turned into gold had become normal again, including his lovely daughter.  For the rest of his life King Midas remembered that it was not wealth that was important but what wealth could bring, and so he distributed much of his wealth to the people in his country, who loved their generous king.

As with most myths and fables, the story of King Midas contains universal truths which we ignore to our peril.

The truth is that it is foolish simply to have money as a goal.  Why would you want money itself?  What is the point?  When searching for the goals that are most meaningful to you find those things that you really want, the things that you would buy if you had enough money.  It may well be that the way to get those things is to get more money, but not necessarily.  You could find, for example, that somebody simply gifts them to you.  A shortcut to obtaining your desire, rather than going the longer route of getting the money and then using that to buy what you want.

Also, if you look carefully at the story of King Midas you will see that he didn't give away all his money and live as a pauper when he saw the error of his ways.  He shared what he had, very generously, and made everyone around him wealthier, but he still had enough money to continue living his dreams.  Hopefully that is what you want to do too.

I love the story of King Midas, as it epitomises for me how I should be using the Law of Attraction.  I do have a certain amount of money as one of my goals on my vision board and in my "mind movies".  But it is not the money that I really focus on.  It is the other things.  The lifestyle I want.  The ability to help others.  The sense of security.  These are things that improve as my money base improves, but it is them that I focus on, not the money itself.

Do you want more money?  Good!  You can get it if you apply the Law of Attraction properly.  But one of the first steps you should take, an essential step which will lead to more money, is to clarify exactly what you want that money for.  Your desire should not be for the money, but for what it can give you.  Work on that and you can become very wealthy indeed!

Wednesday, 6 April 2016

How to Avoid Goal Traps



You may wonder why I am talking about "goal traps".  What exactly is a "goal trap" and why is it so important to avoid it?

Giving Up


I know of many people who have given up on goals for a number of different reasons.

Some have found they set goals in the past which they were never able to achieve.  This has happened to them so often that they have decided there is no point in having any goals.

Some have decided that having goals saps their energy and is tiring.  Far better, they argue, to have no goals and just lazily coast through life.

Some believe there is nothing they particularly want in life, so there is therefore no need for them to have any goals.

Hopefully you do not fall into any of these categories.  But even if you don't now it is possible you will fall into the trap of adopting one of these views at some point in the future, so I want to give you the ammunition now to stop this from ever happening.

Unrealistic Goals


Have you ever had any unrealistic goals?

This is really quite a difficult issue.  I strongly believe in the infinite power of the universe.  This power can achieve literally anything we want.  So how can any goal be unrealistic?

I would suggest the term "unrealistic" is relative rather than absolute.  Yes, it is true you can achieve anything you want if you really want it enough.  But there are two golden rules you must follow if you are going to achieve that goal.

First you must REALLY want to achieve it.  Not simply think it would be quite nice - if your desire is that wishy-washy you are unlikely to achieve anything at all unless it is very easy to achieve in the first place.  You must have a strong desire to achieve it.

Second you cannot have any negative thoughts about it.  This is perhaps the most difficult to achieve.  Say, for example, you are in a wheelchair and your goal is to become the first seriously disabled person to climb Everest.  Certainly that would be classified in most people's minds as an unrealistic goal.  It is not impossible, but the difficulties involved would probably make it seem so to even the most optimistic among us.  If you have chosen that as your goal, then very likely a little voice inside you will keep telling you it is unrealistic and that you have no hope of achieving it.  What makes it unrealistic is not so much the goal itself, but that voice which tells it IS unrealistic.  Unless you are able to avoid any such negative thoughts it is unlikely you will achieve the goal.

Goals Sap Your Energy


Do you find working towards goals is tiring?  Do you sometimes wish you didn't have to work so hard trying to reach goals?  If so, you could be in danger of slipping into the trap of feeling it is better simply not to have any goals in the first place.

This is a trap you simply MUST avoid.  Do anything and everything you can to avoid it.  Once you start on the slippery slope of feeling that goals sap your energy it is very difficult to escape from the trap.

The reality is living a life without goals saps far more energy from you than will the toughest goal.  Read this sentence again, as it is extremely important.  If you take nothing else away from this article, please at least remember this.  Living a life without goals saps far more energy from you than will the toughest goal.

Now you can see why I have called it a slippery slope.  In a goal-less life your energy is dissipated.  The more energy you lose the more difficult it becomes to change direction and start working towards goals again.

The truth is that the right goals do not sap your energy.  The wrong ones can though.  The ones that don't really inspire you and fill you with hopeful energy.  If you find yourself slipping into the "goals are so tiring" mode, you have to look again at the goals you are setting yourself, replacing them with ones that excite you.  As long as you do this you will find your goals energize you rather than sapping your energy.

Nothing You Want


This can be one of the most difficult traps to climb out of if you ever fall into it.  Saying "there is nothing I want in life".  It really is not true, but sometimes it can deceptively seem so.

There are a number of different reasons you might fall into this "goal trap".

Often people fall into it because of one of the earlier traps I have discussed.  They have given up on goals, found their goals were too unrealistic, found their goals sapped too much energy from them, and so they find it easier simply to say they simply don't have any goals.

Feeling there is nothing you want out of life can also be a symptom of depression.  This is a very dangerous condition, and if you believe it possible you are falling into it you really must do something about it.  Go and see a medical professional.  Also, you may find one of my earlier articles helpful.  Try reading my article on how to avoid sadness (http://iwanttoimprovemyself.blogspot.co.uk/2016/02/avoiding-sadness-five-point-plan.html), or the one on using music to ease depression (http://iwanttoimprovemyself.blogspot.co.uk/2015/09/using-music-to-ease-depression.html).

If you do believe there is nothing you want in life, then you should take some time to think about all the things that have made you happy in the past.  Think about the things that gave you a sense of achievement.  Dig beneath them and you will find other things that can inspire you and which could be realistic goals for you to target.

Avoiding Goal Traps


Try not to allow yourself to fall into any of these goal traps.  If you do fall into one, make sure you work on getting out.  Now you know what goal traps are it should be easier for you to recognize them when they arise, and easier for you to find a way out if you inadvertently do fall into one.

Wednesday, 30 March 2016

You can be anything you wish



According to many scientists we do not live in just one universe, but in many.

One concept I have believed since my early teens is that those universes are parallel universes, and that every decision we take moves us into one of an infinite number of parallel universes.  I thought I was alone in believing this, but quite recently a number of physicists have come up with the same concept.  This is perhaps still not quite mainstream science, but it is certainly no longer considered the loony fringe, and some scientists believe this is the only way they can explain some of the apparently contradictory evidence they have collected.

If you will excuse the pun, there is a parallel between the "multiverse" concept and the Schrödinger's cat concept which I explored in an earlier article (http://iwanttoimprovemyself.blogspot.co.uk/2015/10/schrodingers-cat-and-law-of-attraction.html).

What does this mean in practice?

What it means is that somewhere there really is a "you" who has achieved what you hope to achieve.  That "you" already exists.  If you are trying to get slimmer and lose five pounds, you have genuinely already done so.  It is just that at the moment you do not recognize the fact.  You cannot think it is impossible, as it has already happened anyway.  You just need to catch up with the fact.  If you are trying to develop into such a good, loveable person that you attract a really good and loveable partner, again just recognize that this has already happened.  Not yet in this universe, but in another parallel universe.  You simply need to recognize this person already exists and it can happen.

Imagine life is like a very large building with lots of rooms.  As you travel through life you open different doors and enter different rooms.  Each room you enter has lots of other doors which will lead you into lots of other rooms.  If you think this sounds familiar, then perhaps it should.  "My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am." (John 14:2-3, New International Version)

Some people might take this as an excuse not to do anything good in their life, taking the view that there will always be both good and bad futures no matter what they do.  That is a bit like saying if you believe in reincarnation rather than in heaven and hell it doesn't matter what you do, as you can always come back another time and correct it.  In both cases you would be missing the point.  This "multiverse" has a lot of good in it, but also a lot of bad.  You should want to open doors that lead to good futures not to bad ones.  Why would you deliberately choose unhappiness in a bad future rather than happiness in a good one?

Notice how Jesus, in the quote above, says you can be where he is.  I know most Christians would interpret that differently from me, but I interpret that as saying if we listen to our inner voice we will choose to open the right doors which will put us in exactly the right future for us.

The next time you are depressed with the lack of progress you have made, the next time you are pessimistic about what the future holds for you, remember this concept of "many rooms" in our "multiverse".  Remember that a future exists where you have achieved all you ever wanted to achieve, and there is nothing to stop you opening the right doors to reach that wonderful future!

Wednesday, 23 March 2016

The beginning of the universe



Recently I watched a documentary about the latest scientific studies of the beginning of the universe.  So many things the scientists said struck a chord that I read the relevant section of my Bible again.  Take a look at the two different versions:


Big Bang


The Big Bang theory is not universally accepted by scientists, but still has a large and respectable following.  Here, more or less, is what the proponents of Big Bang say happened:
 
  1. In the beginning of space and time was the Big Bang.  The Big Bang resulted in a hydrogen fog.
     
  2. Now the hydrogen fog was a formless, empty cloud.  Darkness covered the universe.
     
  3. After millions of years, atoms of hydrogen coalesced and began fusion reactions forming the first stars.  And the stars gave out light.
     
  4. There were bubbles of light in the primordial universe, separated from each other by the darkness of the hydrogen fog.
     
  5. When the bubbles of light burst through the hydrogen fog, this was Cosmic Dawn, which came after the dark ages of the universe.

Genesis


Now here is Genesis 1: 1-5 (New International Version):
 
  1. In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.
     
  2. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.
     
  3. And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light.
     
  4. God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness.
     
  5. God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.

Comparing Big Bang and Genesis


These two versions are so close!  The only major difference between the two is the word "God", and there is absolutely nothing in Big Bang theory that says it could not have been planned and co-ordinated by God.  The purpose of science is not to prove or disprove the existence and role of God, but merely to discover the rules of the universe which those of us who believe in God believe He created.

When I realised just how close these two versions of the creation of the universe are, it sent a shiver down my spine.  It is almost as though the author of Genesis 1 was a gifted astrophysicist thousands of years before the first astrophysicist was born!

So much of the Bible is not intended to be taken literally as scientific fact, but should be read for its inner meaning just like the many parables Jesus told.  It is good to know, though, that many scientists now at least agree that the first 5 verses of the Bible are indeed scientific fact, stating in a matter of fact way what scientists have only in very recent years been able to piece together as the most likely way in which our universe was created.  I will never again read Genesis 1 without feeling that shiver; a good, comforting shiver.

I believe adherents of Hinduism will find something similar in their own holy writings.  Probably other religions too.  I would be really interested to hear from my non-Christian friends of any similarities they can find in their own religion.  Please feel free to get back to me on this, or with any thoughts of your own, in the comments section.


What This Should Mean to Us


Our distant ancestors knew so much about the basic truths of this universe.  Not from conducting scientific experiments, but by listening to what something other than a cold and logical mind told them.  We can still see this when we look, for example, at some of the beliefs of Australian aborigines.

I hope my readers will take time to meditate, study their own religious writings (of whichever religion that may be), and listen to that small, still voice within - the voice that wants us all to develop ourselves, know the Truth, and grow into better human beings.

Wednesday, 16 March 2016

The Elixir of Life



219 years before Christ a Chinese alchemist, Xu Fu, took 1,000 young people on a trip to discover the secret of immortality.  He never returned.

In 1567, Ming Dynasty Emperor JiaJing is believed to have died from an overdose of the poison mercury.  Jiajing believed that mercury was the elixir of life and would enable him to live forever; instead he died aged 45.

In 18th century Europe, the Count of St Germain claimed to have found the elixir of life and to be 500 years old.  He is believed to have died in 1784, probably in his 70's rather than 500 or more, although some Theosophists and Rosicrucians claim he never died and is still living even today.

Throughout history people have been searching for the mystical elixir of life, for the magical anti ageing secrets that will help them to live forever.  I may not have quite found that magical elixir, but I do have perhaps the next best thing - knowledge of changes you can make in your lifestyle which could significantly extend your life.  And you can relax in the sure knowledge that my anti ageing medicine is not going to give you mercury poisoning!

According to Rose Anne Kenny, Professor of Medical Gerontology at Trinity College Dublin, the three most important factors that will help you extend life and live longer (obviously subject to you not having a fatal accident, suffering a terminal illness etc) are:

1 Properly managing your health;
2 Working on your personal development, continuing to develop your skills and abilities no matter what age you may be;
3 Getting involved in your community, doing things that are a real contribution, helping those around you.


Managing Your Health


I guess everyone knows they should do this and that if they do they have a greater chance of living longer.

"Eat and drink healthily" is important if you want to live to a ripe old age.  But I do not mean you have to be extreme about this.  To me, moderation is the key here.  If you enjoy certain foods that you have been told are not healthy, then I think you should continue to eat them, but only now and again rather than all the time.

Many people get confused by the concept of eating healthily and think this means you have to pick "healthy foods" and only eat those.  The reality is that there is no such thing as "healthy foods".  Yes, read that again!  The concepts of "healthy foods" and "unhealthy foods" don't really exist.  Any food would be unhealthy for you if you ate it to excess.  There is no such thing as a "healthy food", but there is such a thing as a healthy diet.  Try to maintain a good mix of foods that will provide you with all the nutrients you need, and keep a good balance of those different types of food.

Although I have just said you cannot talk about healthy and unhealthy foods, there are, of course, some foods that are not particularly good for you.  Processed foods come into this category.  Especially the packs of "TV dinners" you can buy in supermarkets.  Fresh food is far better for you.  But again, if you are particularly fond of something that is processed (perhaps a fast food hamburger or hot dog) then by all means eat it - just not too often!

Likewise with what you drink.  Don't drink an excess of coffee for example, filling yourself with caffeine.  But unless your doctor has told you to avoid caffeine I do not suggest you drink decaffeinated coffee, and nor am I recommending you give up coffee altogether.  Again, moderation is the key.

Drinking alcohol is exactly the same.  Yes, alcohol is a poison, so you certainly do not want to drink too much.  But there is nothing wrong with drinking moderately.  In fact it is believed that very moderate drinking can keep you healthier and extend your life.

Try not to be a "couch potato".  Find something you enjoy doing that doesn't involve sitting or lying down.  In my case, that hobby is Ballroom and Latin dancing, which for me combines pleasure, exercise, and a social activity.  It also sometimes stretches my mind, forcing me to remember long combinations of steps.  All this is good for maintaining youth!  In your case, maybe it is a sport.  Or going for a nice long swim, run, or cycle ride.  Perhaps a combination of these.  I certainly enjoy cycling from time to time as well as dancing.  Whatever it is you choose, make sure it involves a good bit of exercise.

Be aware of your body and the signals it may be giving you.  This is a wide category.

For example you should remain alert for any signs that could indicate cancer.  If you are female that particularly means regularly checking your breasts.  If you are male you should check your testicles.  For both sexes, stay alert for any lumps anywhere in the body that start to change shape or size, or that start to bleed.  Also stay alert for any changes in the way in which you urinate and pass stools.  Be particularly alert for any blood in your stools or urine.  I have really only touched the surface here, and I suggest you do some research yourself on ways to detect signs of cancer early on.  If you spot anything that disturbs you, contact your doctor.  Doing this can identify a cancer at an early enough stage for it to be stopped in its tracks.  I am speaking with experience, as I suffered from prostate cancer, but recognized the symptoms before it had progressed far and received treatment that completely eliminated it.

These are not the only signals your body gives you.  If you start to overdo something that could impact badly on your health, your body will often tell you.  Perhaps you will start getting more frequent and more painful headaches than you would normally expect.  If so, this is almost certainly your body trying to tell you something.  Slow down and try to listen to what it is saying.


Personal Development


If you want to stay young, then you should do all you can to develop your personal skills and abilities.  This will really make a huge difference to the way you age.  The more you do this, the slower you will age.

This is a very wide field.  It certainly includes doing things that will help you challenge and expand your intellect, even if they are as simple as crosswords and other word games.  But it also includes finding what makes you really happy, and focusing on and developing that.

This entire site is devoted to personal development.  Browse through it and read or re-read articles that strike a bell with you.  If you are not already one of my subscribers, take the time to subscribe now - in just a few seconds you can ensure I will keep in touch with you giving you many different ways of improving your own personal development.  You can do this at www.beallican.com.

Getting Involved


The more you get involved, whether this is with family or the wider community, the slower you will age.  Give of yourself.  Spend time helping others less fortunate than you.

There are many reasons for this.  Firstly, it has been shown that this type of activity automatically makes you happier.  Secondly, the more you are involved, the less lonely you will be.  Thirdly, there is a real sense of fulfilment when you get heavily involved.  And finally, I believe the law of karma is operating here too - by helping others you find good things come to you.  Those good things include a slowing of the ageing process.


You Are as Young as You Feel


This really is true.  Do not be taken in by all the stereotypes about ageing.  If somebody says "You are too old for that!", don't believe them!  In fact, take that as a challenge to do whatever it was you were thinking about doing!  If you do believe the stereotypes you will tend to live down to them.  You may stop doing things you enjoy doing simply because you think older people cannot do them.  Do not allow this to happen to you!

This is not just me saying this.  "The Irish Longitudinal Study on Ageing" proved that the more people believe they will lose their abilities as they got older, the more this actually happens.  The reverse is also true - the more you believe you can continue to do what you enjoy, the longer you will physically be able to do so.  There was also a study by researchers at Yale University which found that a group of elderly people who had a really positive attitude were able to function physically as well as another group that had undertaken a six month exercise programme.

The Irish study also found that people who had positive expectations about the future as they got older lived on average 7 years longer than those who had negative expectations!  Read that again - it is very important!  What are your expectations about your future as you get older?  Are you resigned to dying younger than really need be the case or are you ready to enjoy that future to the full?

Positive thinking really works.  This is just as true about ageing as it is about such things as getting more money, finding love etc.  Start thinking more positively now about your age.  Change how you feel about ageing and you will actually change how you age!

None of us can avoid getting older.  Every day you are older - you are one day older.  That is a simple fact, and nothing can change that unless you have some way of travelling at or close to the speed of light, in which case Einstein tells us you will age slower.  But we can all delay the onset of "old age".  Use the anti-aging techniques I have outlined above.  Don't just do exactly what I have said, and nothing else, but rather use this article as a springboard to research all the ways you can stay young and healthy.  That is the real elixir of life.  Use it well, have fun, and live long!


Wednesday, 9 March 2016

The Power of the Unconscious



Just how powerful is your unconscious mind?

Perhaps before I try to answer this I should clarify what I mean by "unconscious".  It is everything in your mind of which you are not conscious.  Some people try to call this the subconscious mind, but that is not the true term.  "Subconscious" is a part of the mind which is accessible, but of which you are not aware at the time.  Another way of putting this is that it is the "non-mindfulness" part of your mind (if you are not familiar with this term, I will be producing an article about Mindfulness later this year).  For example you may be so used to walking from your home to your office that you do so automatically, without being aware of the journey at all.  This is the subconscious mind controlling your journey.  The unconscious mind includes this, but also includes parts of your mind that are not normally accessible at all.  You may be completely unaware of what is happening in your unconscious mind, but it is still happening.

To a degree, I tend to follow Jung's view of the unconscious mind.  That is, we have both a personal and a collective unconscious.  In our personal unconscious are our personal memories.  Things we have thought about and that are now permanently a part of us but of which we are no longer consciously aware.  In our collective unconscious are what you might think of as cultural "memories" and even memories going right back to the origin of mankind.

But the unconscious is more than just memories.  It is a real force.  Restricting it to just memories is missing the real power of the unconscious.  It includes what Hindus and some Buddhists refer to as "Atman", an absolute and essential "self".  The true self.  What Paul Brunton referred to in his works as the "Overself".  Almost God-like.  In fact, I believe it IS God expressing Himself through us.  When we sit in silence, listening for the voice of God, we hear that voice.  It comes from within, and yet it is all powerful and not really "within" at all.  It is not restricted to the "archetypes" of the collective unconscious, as Jung called them, but is really the power of the entire universe.

The Overself is the perfect being you are intended to be.  Somewhere along the road you lost that perfection, but it is still there within you waiting to be found again.  Hidden in your unconscious mind.  All the personal development work you do is really one small step in that journey to finding and releasing the Overself that is right there waiting to be released.

So how powerful is your unconscious mind?  The answer is, it is all-powerful!  There is absolutely no limit to its power - or rather the only limits are the limits you place on it yourself.  Keep going on your personal development journey, knowing that the power of the universe, or the power of God, is waiting for you and helping you to reach your goal!

Wednesday, 2 March 2016

Vision Board


Do you have a vision board, or what I personally call my treasure map?

If you have followed many of the free webinars and ready many of the free e-books I have sent to my subscribers then you probably have your own vision board.  Hopefully you also use it regularly.

But if you are not one of my subscribers, and have not studied much material on manifesting then perhaps you do not know what a vision board is.

A properly created vision board is a way of really motivating and exciting you about whatever it is you want to achieve.  It is also a way of communicating that desire to the Universe, which makes it far more likely you really will achieve it.

Actually, there is something even more fundamental than this happening when you create your vision board.  So many people do not really understand what it is they want to achieve in life.  They have never thought about it properly.  But when you start to create your vision board this forces you to focus on what you want.  Sometimes when you do that you realize that what you thought you wanted is not really something you want at all.  Perhaps it is something your parents, friends or partner told you that you should want.  Or you have been taken in by the commercialism that surrounds most of us every day, and believe the adverts that tell you this is what you want.

If you already have a vision board I want you now to focus on it.  Does it excite you?  Does it make you feel really happy knowing what is on there is coming your way?  It should.  If it doesn't, then I suggest you go right back to the drawing board and start over.  Create a brand new one that does excite you, and that does make you really happy.

If you don't already have a vision board, and if there is anything at all that you want to achieve, then take some time right now to make one.

Begin by deciding exactly what it is you really want, and write down what that is.  This can be anything at all.  Maybe true love?  Perhaps a career that really excites you?  The chance to make a real difference in the world?  It can also be a collection of objectives that are linked.  For example a lovely house right on the beach in a hot climate, plus a lamborghini car, plus your own private jet ... that list might go on for a bit, but don't stop it.  As long as these are things you really want, then list them.

Make sure whatever it is you have listed really does excite you.  Does it feel right to you?  Is it really what you want?  In other articles in this blog I have written about the importance of making sure you are properly aligned with your inner purpose.  This really is key, so do not leave this step out.

Once you are certain you have the right goals listed, the next step is to state them in a single phrase set in the present tense, showing you have already achieved them.  In other words, do not say something like "I want to have a lovely house right on the beach in a hot climate, a lamborghini car, and my own private jet!".  Instead, in this specific example you would say "I have a lovely house right on the beach in a hot climate, a Lamborghini car, and my own private jet!".  If these really were your goals you would be even more specific than this.  You would probably say how many rooms that house has and exactly where it is.  You would say the make and model of the private jet you want.  If your response to this is "I don't really know!" then go away and do some research.  Make sure you DO know!

Now find the right pictures illustrating those goals.  Look far and wide for these.  Cut them out and arrange them on your vision board.  If there is not enough space to fit them all on, then get a bigger sheet of paper, write your goals at the top again, and arrange your pictures on this new vision board.  When the arrangement feels right, get some glue and stick those pictures down.

Don't just use pictures though.  Write down some other things about each goal that really excite you.

Now at the bottom of your vision board, write this, or something similar:

"I choose to create all this or something better!"

Finally, draw a thick line all around the edges of your vision board.  This is the limit line.  It tells your subconscious mind, or the Universe, that once it has given you what you desire, it doesn't need to keep giving you more of it.  If you have entered a "Cessna Citation Hemisphere" as something you really want, then I imagine you don't actually need or want a whole fleet of Cessnas.  If you do, then that is what you should put anyway!  So you put the limit line to clarify that you don't want to keep adding that particular thing.  Why is this necessary?  Because of the power of a vision board!  It really is that powerful!  Some people have put "money" as their goal, and not limited it on their vision board.  The power of the vision board brings them money.  Lots of it.  Far more than they need or want.  But it brings them no enjoyment as they keep wanting more and more money and are never satisfied.  The limit line can stop this happening.

Now that you have your vision board, use it properly.  Every day, in fact several times a day, look at it and allow the warm feeling of achieving everything on it to flow through you.

Create and use your vision board properly and you can achieve everything you really wish to achieve.

Wednesday, 24 February 2016

Abundance Thinking and Limitation


What does the word "abundance" mean to you?

For far too many people it means something that doesn't exist.  They believe in limitation rather than abundance.  They believe there is a limited supply of everything and that we must either compete and even fight with others to gain whatever it is we want, or we must accept that because there is a limited supply we must limit ourselves, not try to get everything we want, and that if we do anything different we are greedy.

For many things that we want it is simply illogical to believe in any limitation.  Take happiness, for example.  Is there a limited supply of happiness in the universe?  Really?  Why on earth should there be?  There are no limits to happiness.  Yes, things can happen which impact on our happiness, although there are always ways of controlling that impact.  But there is certainly not a limited supply of happiness, and it would be entirely illogical to believe there was.  Yet so many people behave in a way that shows they subconsciously believe there is a limited supply.  They don't believe it is right to want to be happy when so many people in the world are sad.  Why?  If you choose to be sad too does that reduce the sadness of people around you?  No, of course not!  In fact, just the opposite.  Happiness can be contagious, so by developing and nurturing happiness in yourself you can also spread happiness in the world.  Isn't that a good thing to do?  There are no limits to happiness.  There is an abundance of happiness in the world.

Or how about love?  Is that limited?  Of course not!  If you are looking for love, then don't go around believing it is limited.  Are you looking for your life partner, for someone who will love you without limit and whom you can love without limit?  But have you started to believe that perhaps there is no such person?  Or were you looking for a group of friends you can really love without limits and who will really love you without limits, and then gave up at some point because you felt this would never materialize?  There are no limits to love.  There is an abundance of love in the world.  Open your heart to it and allow that abundance to manifest within your life.

On a more practical level, many people today are concerned about limited resources in the world.  There are limited amounts of raw materials.  There are limits on the amount of energy we can produce without depleting resources for future generations and destroying mother earth.  At least there is more logic in this thinking.  It is true we have over exploited many of the earth's resources and continue to do so.  It is good to look at your carbon footprint and try to find ways to reduce it so you are causing less damage to the world in which you live.  But ultimately, in the future, is there a true limit here or is there a hidden abundance for which we simply have to find the key?  I believe it is the latter.  So does eminent scientist Peter Diamond, a medically qualified space scientist and engineer who graduated from both MIT (Massachusetts Institute of Technology) and Harvard Medical School, and who co-founded the International Space University and the Singularity University.  Peter Diamond believes in abundance even in the area of energy and resources.  He believes mankind has the ability to find ways around the limitations we see today and create an abundant future.  Check out his books "Abundance: The Future Is Better Than You Think", and only just published on 23rd February 2016 "BOLD: How to Go Big, Create Wealth, and Impact the World".  In the universe there is an abundance of energy and resources.  We just have to find ways to unlock that abundance.

Another practical area where far too many people believe in limitation is that of money.  Again, the prevailing belief, which is completely wrong, is that there is a limited supply of money, and that it is evil to want lots of money as you will then be depriving others of the money they need.  This is nonsense!  If you really want to become wealthy the best way of doing so is not to take wealth that belongs to others but to help others achieve what they want to achieve.  Doing this is the best way of becoming really wealthy, and it is also very ethical.  You are not taking wealth away from others but becoming wealthy by helping others.  Zig Ziglar said "You will get all you want in life if you help enough other people get what they want."  He was not just talking about wealth here, but certainly this applies very much to wealth.  There is no limitation to wealth.  Wealth is abundant.

Whatever it is you want, recognize it is here in the universe in abundance.  There are no limits.  Only the limits you have created in your own mind.  Break the shackles of those blocks you have created and claim the abundance that is waiting there for you.  Claim it, and at the same time share that abundance with others.  Your own life will be far better and so will the lives of your family, friends, and others around you.

Wednesday, 17 February 2016

The Secret Law of Attraction



What is the secret of the Law of Attraction?

If I had been given a penny every time somebody asked me that question I would be a lot wealthier!  Perhaps more to the point, if they hadn't needed to ask the question in the first place, they would probably have been a lot wealthier too!

The truth is, if it is a secret it is an open secret.  Nobody is hiding anything here, but the basic concept is actually so simple that most people think there must be more to it, that there must be some hidden depths only revealed to initiates.

The basic principle of the Law of Attraction is that you attract to yourself what you focus on.  Not what you want - what you focus on.

Read that last sentence again, as it is probably the most important lesson you will ever learn.  Far too many people fail to achieve what they want to achieve because their focus is elsewhere.  Especially if their focus is on the negatives, on what they are trying to avoid rather than what they are trying to achieve.  I have said this in earlier blogs, but I do not apologize for saying it again, because it is such a key principle.  Do not focus on trying to get rid of or avoid the nasty things in life, but focus instead on gaining the good and positive things.

Taking a step back, before you even begin to direct your focus on your objective, make sure you have chosen the right objective.  It is no good focusing the power of attraction on something unless that is something you really, genuinely want.  There are two good reasons for this.

  1. Firstly, if it is not something you REALLY want, it is not going to make you very happy when you get it.  Pretty obvious, when you think about it, but it happens more often than you might imagine.  Frequently this happens to people who try to use the secret of attraction to attract lots of money.  It was not really the money they wanted but rather some of the things that money can buy.  But when they get the money they stay focused on just the money itself and lose track of why they really wanted it.  They become wealthier, but at the same time unhappier.
     
  2. Secondly, if your deep, inner desire is for something different from what you believe you want and what you focus on, then there will always be a conflict.  All the time you are focused on what you think you want, something inside you will be working against you, knowing that is not what you really want.  When this happens you will probably find you do not attract what you are focused on.  You will give up and start bad mouthing "The Secret", and the Law of Attraction.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with the film and the book "The Secret".  They reveal the truth.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with the Law of Attraction.  It works.  But there IS something wrong with the way you are trying to use them.

"The Law of Attraction attracts to you everything you need, according to the nature of your thoughts. Your environment and financial condition are the perfect reflection of your habitual thinking."  (Joseph Murphy)

So it is your habitual thinking you have to work on.  Change that, and the Law of Attraction will start working properly for you.

The Law of Attraction is a natural law, just like the law of gravity, just like the laws of motion.  When your car doesn't move you don't believe it is because the laws of motion have failed.  That isn't the reason, and you wouldn't dream of trying to say that.  Your car has stopped because there is something wrong in the car.  Perhaps you didn't put in enough petrol.  When the Law of Attraction does not bring you the things you want it is not because the Law of Attraction does not work but because there is something wrong in the way you are trying to use it.  Find what is wrong and fix it and you will find the Law of Attraction works properly for you.

Take the time to find out what you truly desire rather than what on the surface you think you desire.  Then spend time framing the right affirmations to bring it to you.  Make those affirmations positive, not negative.  Put them in the present tense, not the future.  Know that you really have achieved this, that the Universe has delivered it to you.  This has already happened in the "inner world" and all you need do now now is to be patient and to find it in the "outer world".  Do this at least once a day, but preferably more often.  Be aware of any blocks you might have which are preventing you from truly focusing on what you want.  These are often blocks you acquired as a young child without realizing what was happening.  If you find those blocks, counter them.  Recognize they no longer have any power over you and that now you are achieving what you want to achieve.

That last paragraph is the essence of the Law of Attraction, the secret behind it.  Do this properly and you too will be able to achieve all you really want to achieve!

Wednesday, 10 February 2016

Avoiding Sadness - the Five Point Plan




Being Sad


I have written several articles focussing on happiness, showing how and why we should be happy most of the time.  In this article I want to turn this on its head a little.  Instead of simply talking about happiness, let's think a moment about sadness.

Sometimes it may be appropriate to be sad.  In Ecclesiastes we are reminded that there is a right time for everything, including a time for being sad.  Solomon was renowned as a very wise man, and it is widely believed that Solomon wrote Ecclesiastes.  Whoever wrote it, there are some very wise words in this book, and you do not need to be a practising Jew or Christian to find it helpful. In chapter 3 we are told "there is a time to cry and a time to laugh, a time to be sad and a time to dance."  If, for example, you have just lost your life partner to cancer I really wouldn't expect you to get up and dance.  Having said that, you should know in your heart that your life partner would not want you to be sad, so the time for sadness should be very limited.

Usually, though, it is not at all appropriate to be sad.  Many people are often sad and cannot say why they feel this way.  They just do!  If this happens to you, don't despair - as I said, this happens to many people.

Depression


It is important to recognize whether you are simply sad or are suffering from clinical depression.  If the former I have some answers for you below in the five point plan.  If the latter you probably need some additional help.  Go and see your doctor.  Don't be embarrassed about doing this.  Depression is as much an illness as is cancer.  In both cases you need treatment or the illness may kill you.  The earlier you seek help the more likely something can be done about it.

Some very famous and successful people have suffered from, but also survived, depression, including (in no particular order):
  •  Actress Catherine Zeta-Jones, who has bipolar II disorder
  •  Boxer Frank Bruno, who has bipolar disorder which led to him being briefly sectioned under the mental health act.
  •  Actress Gwyneth Paltrow, who suffered from postpartum depression after the birth of her son Moses
  •  Actress and singer Kylie Minogue, who suffered clinical depression when she was diagnosed with breast cancer
  •  US President Abraham Lincoln, whose depression frequently made him feel completely inadequate and whose friends had to put him on suicide watch
  •  "Harry Potter" author J K Rowling, whose depression made her suicidal and had a course of cognitive behavioural therapy
  •  Canadian singer/songwriter Leonard Cohen, who credits his practice of Zen Buddhism with the cure of his depression
  •  British Prime Minister and Nobel Prize winner Sir Winston Churchill, who called his manic depression "black dog"
  •  Astronaut and Moon walker Buzz Aldrin
  •  Discoverer of gravity and the laws of motion, Sir Isaac Newton
  •  Comic actor Jim Carrey


Some of the symptoms of clinical depression include:
  •  Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness, and believing your situation cannot improve and there is simply nothing you can do about it
  •  A loss of interest in hobbies and activities you used to enjoy
  •  Changes in sleep pattern (either oversleeping or an inability to sleep)
  •  Changes in appetite and changes in weight (usually a gain or loss of more than 5% in a month)
  •  An unusually short temper causing strong feelings of anger
  •  Reckless behaviour (e.g. binges of drinking, compulsive gambling)
  •  A feeling of listlessness and loss of energy
  •  Problems concentrating on anything or making important decisions
  •  Feelings of worthlessness or guilt
  •  Unexplained headaches


If you have several of these symptoms, or even only one or two but to an extreme, it is very likely you have some form of clinical depression.  Remember that list of famous people who have similarly suffered with depression.  Recognize you are not alone.  Accept the fact that you need some help to deal with this just as so many of them did too and visit your doctor for advice before it is too late.  At the same time, with the knowledge of your doctor, try some of the techniques below.

The Five Point Plan


Whether you had a good reason to be sad but now that time has passed or you are sad but do not know the reason why, you should have a good armoury of techniques to counter this sadness.  This applies equally to people with depression and to those who are not clinically depressed but still sad.  The five point plan I am going to suggest as your armoury was originally proposed by the 13th century Italian monk, St Thomas Aquinas.  Although Aquinas was a Catholic priest these are not religious practices, so they are equally appropriate whether you are a Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist ... or of no religion at all.

Thomas Aquinas suggests five simple practices to shake off your sadness:

  1. Treat yourself.  This is a practice I also recommend to anyone trying to improve themselves - reward yourself properly for each step forward you take.  I find, for example, it is a good way for students to study properly, rewarding themselves after, say, an hour of solid study.  But now I am not talking about a reward.  I am talking about giving yourself something you like for no other reason than that you like it.  This may be a few glasses of wine, a bar of chocolate, a visit to a concert ... the list goes on, and your choices from that list will be very personal to you.  Surprisingly, too many people find this exercise very difficult.  They feel guilty.  If there is a cost involved they feel it is a waste of money that should be used for something "more sensible".  Even if there is not a cost involved, they feel for some other reason that it is wrong to enjoy pleasure for pleasure's sake.  Rid yourself of that guilt feeling.  There is no need to feel guilty, as what you are doing is not frivolous.  You are treating your sadness in a way that may avoid the need for medication.  In fact, do not simply use this to treat sadness when it arrives, but use it as a way of avoiding the sadness in the first place.  Make it a habit to treat yourself in this way regularly.  Do it for no other reason than the fact that it is something you enjoy.  Just as you give gifts to the most important people in your life (at least, I hope you do!), give gifts to yourself.  Actually, if you get into the habit of doing this you will also find it will become more natural for you to give gifts to others.  As has often been said, in order to love others, first learn to love yourself.  And if you love yourself, why not treat yourself to lovely gifts?
  2. Cry.  Too many of us feel it is wrong to cry - especially men.  It is not wrong to cry.  Rather, it is wrong not to cry if you really are sad.  Crying allows you to release sorrow that will otherwise be bottled up inside you and will continue to hurt you until eventually you find a way to release it.  Why not release it right away by crying?  Cry even if whatever is causing you sadness is not really anything too bad.  By crying you can wipe that sadness away almost in an instant.
  3. Share your sadness with a friend.  Again, this is something it is often a lot easier for women to do than men.  But whether you are a man or a woman, sharing your sorrow will help relieve it.  If you have a life partner it is almost certainly best to share your sorrows with him or her.  Typically you will find a woman is better at reacting in the right way than a man.  Men tend to believe that if someone brings them a problem they are expected to find an answer to that problem.  Women, on the other hand, often want nothing more than someone sympathetic to share the problem.  Sometimes a husband trying to give an answer to the problem his wife has brought to him will be dismayed to find she seems to be ungrateful.  The problem here is that she wanted someone to understand, and by giving her what he believes is the answer the husband has made her feel he does not understand, and does not sympathise with her.  If you are a man and your wife is trying to share her sadness with you, do not initially try to give her an answer.  Instead, listen and hug her.  Let her share that sadness and show her you care.  Later, if there IS an answer (and often there is not!) you can suggest that answer to her.  But only after you have allowed you to share properly with you first.  Likewise, if you are a man you should realize that the purpose of sharing your sadness with your partner is not to try to get an answer.  Don't expect an answer, just a lightening of your burden as you share it.  And if you are a woman trying to share your sadness with a man, recognize he may not understand what reaction you need.  Perhaps you should preface it by telling him you have this sadness and that you need to share it with him, but you are not looking for an answer.  That way he will be better prepared to handle this in the right way.  If you do not have a life partner you should try to find some very good friends you trust enough to share your sadness.  Don't wait until you need to share - go out now and start looking for those real friends.
  4. Think about and immerse yourself in what I think of as Eternal Truths.  This will mean different things to different people, but it can include great music, literature, and art, as well as meditation and / or prayer if you find these practices helpful.  It can include walking in the countryside enjoying the great views and the reminder of how wonderful the world around us is, or viewing the night sky through a telescope and marvelling at the beauty and immensity of it all.  When you immerse yourself in these eternal truths you will find your sadness is rightly put in its place, as sadness is not an eternal truth.
  5. Enjoy a nice, long and luxurious bath and a good long sleep.  This really needs little more explanation.  A good bath and a proper sleep can work wonders!


The next time you feel sad for any reason, try this five step plan which was given to us eight centuries ago.  I think you will be amazed at just how effective it can be!


Wednesday, 3 February 2016

How to make a difference in the world



In my last blog I talked about how nobody can be too small or too insignificant to make a difference.  You make a difference all the time just by being who you are.  One person can make a real difference in the world, and if you have been reading my blog for a while you will have read stories of individuals who have done exactly that, sometimes in quite dramatic ways.

Some readers have asked me to be more specific.  "How can I make a difference?" seems to be a commonly shared question.

The first thing you must recognize is the importance of the little things.  These are the things that often truly make a difference in life.  If you run a business you will probably realize this.  Many of us who run businesses will have tried to find the really big change we can make and got frustrated we could not find it.  Those of us who remained successful probably did so by recognizing there is not one big thing we need to change but rather lots of little changes.  Each change of itself seems almost insignificant, but when you make a number of changes they multiply the effect rather than simply add to it.  It is the same with making things better in the world.  Do not expect there to be one big thing that jumps out and that you have to work on to effect change.  Almost certainly that will not happen.  You just have to do little things that improve the lives of those around you.

One of the first that comes to mind is expressing gratitude.  Too few people do this, so those who do make a significant change in the lives of people they meet - a good change.  Gratitude is really important.  Spend time thinking about all the things for which you should be grateful.  In many cases there will not be anybody specific you need to thank, but make sure you cultivate the habit of being grateful even when there is nobody to thank.  But there will also be lots of cases where there IS someone you can thank.  Make sure you do it, even if some time has passed.  There is a double benefit here.  You will almost certainly be making someone else feel really good, which can then multiply the benefit like ripples spreading out in a pond, but you will also be setting yourself up for receiving more of whatever it is you are grateful for.  Recognizing what you should be grateful for and then expressing that gratitude should become a habit.  Eventually you will do it without having to think about it, just like any other habit.  People will notice your gratitude and it will make you rather special in their minds.  It will encourage them to do even more things for you.  As I said, a double benefit.

Another important way of making a difference is to follow the Golden Rule.  In other words, always try to do to and for others what you would wish them to do to and for you.  Well, to be honest I would modify that rule slightly.  Empathize with those around you.  They may not actually want the things you want.  Try to feel what it is they would appreciate and do that for them.  The Golden Rule is a very good rule to use when you don't know people very well, so continue using it, but do everything you can to get to know people with whom you have any contact so you can treat them the way they would like to be treated.

As Gandhi said, be the change you wish to see in the world.  If, like so many Miss Worlds, you want there to be world peace, you have to start that within yourself.  Do everything you can to be a peaceable, non-violent person.  Whenever you are tempted to react in anger, pause.  Think about the situation from the perspective of the other person and modify your response.  Recognize that violence between countries and between people usually arises because of misunderstandings and the lack of ability to see things from a different perspective.  This attitude will then spread and "infect" those around you.  Unless you are the president or prime minister of a powerful country this is the only way you can create world peace, but believe me when I say it is very powerful indeed.

Think about what it is you do in life.  Your job for example.  If you really want to make a difference think about whether the work you do can make that difference.  If you are in a caring profession, for example nursing, teaching, social work etc, then it most certainly can.  These are jobs that make a difference.  But making a difference is certainly not restricted to these professions.  It may be that you will decide as a result to change career.  If not, then think about how you might change the way you work so that you make a difference to the lives of your work colleagues.

Be there for your friends.  This has so many meanings, and they are all important.  Yes, if a friend needs to know you are there to listen and sympathize then do that very simple but important thing for them.  Really listen to them and respond appropriately.  Do not be like the cartoon husband who just keeps saying "Yes, dear!" to his wife but isn't listening to a word she is saying.  When you are physically present, be mentally and emotionally present for them too.  Don't be like those you see who spend so much time texting friends who are not physically present that they pay no attention to those who are!  Be mindful, be aware, recognize the wonder that is around you - be fully focussed on what you are doing with your friends rather than thinking about, for example, what you are going to do next.

One practical tip which I mentioned in the previous blog, but which is so important I will say it again, is to smile.  Smiling is a universal sign of friendliness.  When you smile at someone it is much easier for them to smile back than to frown.  Believe it or not there was a study on this very subject in Sweden in 2002, where people were told to smile or frown when looking at photos of people smiling or frowning.  Sometimes they were told to smile in response to a frown or frown in response to a smile, and sometimes they were told to smile in response to a smile and frown in response to a frown.  The study proved beyond any doubt that if someone smiles at you it is easier to smile back than to frown.  Just think about this for a moment.  You smile at someone and this causes them to smile.  They may still be smiling several seconds later when they meet some other people.  Each of those people they meet then smile, and that too is reflected in the people they meet.  Just one smile from you can make an enormous difference.  Remember, when you smile you will be happier than when you frown.  Just as your inner emotions reflect physically in smiles or frowns, so those smiles or frowns reflect emotively in the way you feel. And yes, there have been scientific studies that prove this too!  So to create happiness in both yourself and those around you, simply smile!

There will certainly be plenty of things you can do to make a difference in the world that I have not listed here.  Each of us has very different circumstances and can effect change in so many different ways.  But if you try all of the above, and keep doing those things, I can promise you that the world will be a very much better place both for you and for those around you - and probably even for people the other side of the world through chance happenings of which you may never be aware!